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Grey Chronicles
Nine
As Eve and Raven vanished, Pandora appeared and moved to take up position near Iain. He glanced at her curiously. “Am I missing something?”
“No, you’re not missing anything.” Her tone suggested that someone was, however.
He gave a mental shrug. Sometimes Pandora could give the mythical inscrutable Chinese stereotype a run for its money. She’d reveal what was going on in her own good time. “OK. Kerrik, this is Pandora and she’s also part of my harem. Pandora, this is Kerrik Wolf.”
She nodded to him briefly. “Kerrik.”
Kerrik chuckled. “Pandora. Iain, how big is your harem?”
Iain smiled. “That depends on who you ask. Pandora, why are you here?”
“Eve left.”
“So what, the amount of celestial essence around me was in danger of dropping to an unacceptable level? Try again.”
“Eve left and April and Ninhursag are distracted.”
Iain looked around. “So?”
“Ninhursag has standing orders that you’re not supposed to be left unguarded.”
Iain sighed. Sometimes getting answers out of Pandora was like pulling a snack away from a hungry Snorlass. “So you’re here to make sure that order gets followed.”
“No disrespect to Kerrik, but if we get sloppy once it’ll become a habit.”
“She’s right,” Kerrik said quietly. “And you’ve already admitted that you’re not powerful enough yet to protect yourself without help.”
“Et tu, Wolf?”
Kerrik burst out laughing. “Yes, me too. At least you’re not one of those barbarian fledglings who is completely uneducated.”
“Pandora, what are you doing here?” Ninhursag was looking at the Archangel unhappily.
“Doing my job,” Pandora said flatly. “You’re playing with babies, April is reminiscing about Blue and Eve is off with Raven. I am guarding Iain.”
The silver haired Elfqueen’s silver eyes narrowed dangerously. “Where is Eve?”
Pandora snorted. “I wouldn’t blame her if I were you. All failures of the harem are your responsibility and neither of you even noticed she’d gone.”
“Enough.” Everyone turned to look at Iain. “I sent Eve on a mission that we’d agreed on. You knew someone had to show her around the places we live and you and April were busy. While I don’t necessarily think I need a full time guard, apparently you do. Pandora is supposed to be my primary bodyguard with Canaan and Dominique as backup. She is just doing her job.”
“I left her in charge at the ranch. She should have sent Canaan.”
“Trust me,” Pandora smiled without humor, “when I say you don’t want Canaan anywhere near you right now. She’s ready to kill you just enough that you can still be pokeballed and saved.”
Kerrik’s ears flicked. “Canaan?”
“Hunter Amachamp.”
“Ah. I thought the behavior sounded familiar. She and Misery might get along.”
“They just might, but she’s got more in common with Whisper. Still, I need to nip this in the bud.” Iain raised his voice. “Did I not just fucking say enough? Nobody gets killed today, even a little bit and nobody gets their ass chewed on.” He pointed at April as she opened her mouth. “And don’t say ‘Iain’.”
She smiled slightly. “What should I call you? Asshole? It won’t sound nearly as nice in bed.” She tasted his emotions through their bond and relaxed slightly when she realized he wasn’t really upset yet. “To be honest, I agree with you. We weren’t doing our job and Pandora is to be commended for covering for our lapse. The fact that she came in place of Canaan, who is angry, is also to be commended since she’s more focused than Canaan would be if she were here instead.”
Iain sighed. “Kerrik, I think we need to be going. The whole some people being angry and others being apologetic thing is probably going to take a while to resolve and there’s no reason to do it in front of your family.”
“I understand.” Kerrik gave a half bow in Iain’s direction. “Iain Grey, you and yours are welcome here at any time.” He smiled when Iain looked surprised. “We’ll work out a schedule for your instruction. Can I ask how you’re studying now?”
“I was drawn to a truewizard primer and I’m using it as a guide while doing independent study so I don’t get locked into what the books teach. I’d appreciate any lessons you’re willing to give.”
Eve appeared with Raven.”Iain,” she began, only to stop when he shook his head.
“Ladies, I’m going home. Kerrik, members of his harem, I wish to thank you for hosting us. We’ll have to do the same for you sometime soon.” He took Pandora’s hand. “Take me to our Austin home, please.” They vanished.
Pandora let him go and cocked her head, frowning suspiciously. “I think you’ve learned something new and, if you have, I’m not sure I like this new ability.”
“What are you talking about?”
“My delta bond with you says you’re mildly irritated but the set of your shoulders and the look in your eyes says you’re furious. Add that to the fact that you wanted to come here instead of the ranch and it adds up to something disquieting. Have you learned to hide your emotions from me?”
He glanced at her and trudged down to the main pool, kicked off his boots and waded in until he was ankle deep. The water, coming up from deep in the earth, was somewhere around 20oC and he sighed in pleasure as it washed over his toes. His face tightened again when Pandora cleared her throat behind him. “It’s an offshoot of my attempts to mitigate the effect my nightmares have been having on you and the others.”
“I thought your nightmares had been getting less severe.” Eve appeared next to her and Pandora held a finger to her lips.
Iain didn’t turn around. “You keep forgetting that with my perception I can see behind me. Hell, I can see the worms in the mud underneath me. I know that Eve’s here. My nightmares haven’t gotten better. I’ve just been filtering the emotional loading from what ya’ll have been getting across the links.”
“Iain, I’m sorry I abandoned you like that.”
“You didn’t, Eve.” Both celestials exchanged a surprised look as he continued. “I gave you a job to do and you did it. I can’t ask for more than that. I didn’t think I needed a guard there. Everyone was being friendly. Of course, I didn’t know about Ninhursag’s order that I always have a keeper, but when Pandora showed up I wasn’t upset.”
Pandora looked at Eve in puzzlement for a second. “So what made you mad?”
“Bad manners.”
“I don’t understand.”
“When did it become acceptable to air our dirty laundry in front of strangers?”
Eve frowned. “Iain?” At her mental summons, Ninhursag and April appeared.
Iain turned around. “It’s a simple question. All of you are adult and none of you are stupid, so when did it become family policy to fight, cut down and shame family members in front of ABSOLUTE FUCKING STRANGERS?”
He blinked when he realized he was bellowing and took a deep breath. “Once upon a time it was us against them and we presented a united front to people we didn’t know or didn’t like. When did that change? I’m afraid I never got the memo.” His gaze swept the group. “Has it occurred to you that while we’re settling into a new life in a new place the fucking war IS STILL GOING ON?” He grimaced. “We still have battles and enemies in front of us and we still have to have a united fucking front in public.”
He glared at Pandora. “What did I hear from you?” His voice became a falsetto. “‘I’m doing my job and you’re not, Ninhursag, you stupid arrogant bitch.’” Pandora went white as he turned on Ninhursag. “Your response was ‘This isn’t my fault. Where’s that whore Eve?’” He looked at April. “And you were all ‘I’m so sorry I dropped the ball Iain, I’m hopeless.’” He glared at them all. “I tried to stop it because in my head I was thinking: ‘I can’t fucking believe they’re doing this in front of Kerrik, the Deaths and General fucking Autumn.’ Want to know what Kerrik was probably thinking? He was probably wondering what the fuck Magdalene saw in someone so bloody pathetic and trying to decide as to what was the absolute minimum amount he could teach me so I stop wasting his fucking time.”
His look at Eve was scathing. “Fortunately I managed to shut you down before you could go all weepy too. Regardless of the fact that this violates one of the two hard and fast rules for social behavior, I have to ask if this is the future we have? Where it’s all blame and apologies in an endless circle until we all die?” He folded his arms and suddenly they could feel the boiling hot fury bubbling on his end of their bonds. “Other than apologies, which I do not want to hear, does anyone have anything to say?”
“What are the two hard and fast rules for social behavior?” Eve turned to see Vanessa and Canaan sitting on the edge of the pool wall. Vanessa nodded to her. “I didn’t know these rules and, since we’re having a senior family discussion, I wanted to find out so I don’t break them.”
Iain shrugged. “The rules are; do not ever go to bed until any disputes have been resolved and don’t fight in front of people who aren’t family. The first rule is because if you go to bed angry you wake up even angrier than when you went to bed and the second is because it’s none of their fucking business and shows weaknesses to be exploited.” His anger began to fade as he put it back where it belonged. “Does anyone want to tell me that my interpretation of today’s events is wrong?”
April squared her shoulders. “No. We were pretty pathetic. The question now becomes what do we do about it?”
“Nothing.” Pandora was watching Iain. “At least nothing in public. If Kerrik thinks we’re pathetic, he’s unlikely to see us as a threat and we have achieved part of our goal in answering his summons. If he’s still willing to tutor Iain, so much the better, but if he’s not then we will continue on without his help.”
“And in private,” Eve asked, “what do we do to fix this?”
“No more recriminations and no more apologies for anything that’s past,” Iain said. “We’ll adopt my family’s rule that nothing can be brought up in a fight that occurred more than six months in the past or the last fight, whichever happened most recently.”
“I like that idea,” Eve said.
“You would,” Canaan muttered.
“That takes care of the name calling,” Pandora pointed out. “What about the underlying issues that caused it in the first place?”
“Everyone here is a veteran and we all know the answer to that,” Ninhursag stated flatly. “We go back to our old training regimen and cultivate an ‘us vs. them’ mentality again.” She looked at Iain and continued relentlessly. “Under that program I have to ask what you think we should do about our new employees. As they are, they’re a potential weak link in our defenses.”
Iain sighed. “I’m not sure. We need them and we need to weld them to us as much as we can to reduce the risk they present, but damn it I also want them to be as free as possible to make their own choices.”
Canaan stirred. “I can scan them and I can do it without them knowing that I was ever in their minds. It’ll let us know for sure that they’re not a threat but it goes against the philosophy the Texans are trying to live by.”
April cursed in Gaelic. Iain blinked and carefully filed the words he hadn’t heard before away for later use. She glared at nothing in particular. “We all know what really has to be done with them. Either they leave or Iain bonds them.”
“Daphne doesn’t want to be bonded,” Pandora pointed out. “And it’s likely she’s not alone.”
“I am not fucking anyone who isn’t interested,” Iain stated flatly.
“Of course you won’t,” Vanessa countered, “but both Ryan and Winifred would jump at the opportunity. Give anyone who doesn’t think they want bonded a couple of weeks of living around us and they’ll probably want Iain as their man too. Those that really don’t want to be bonded get excluded from our house, when it gets built.”
“If it gets built,” someone whispered/muttered.
Canaan’s antenna twitched. “We can use this clan thing that Theodora imposed on us.”
Excuse me?
She flashed her fangs in a smile. “I thought you were listening.”
I am always listening. What about the rest of your harem? Shouldn’t they have a say in this discussion?
“Except for Dominique, here we have the harem’s inner circle.” Eve shrugged. “The others will follow our lead but we will ask and see if they have any reservations.”
If I am the one who imposed the clan paradigm on you, may I make a suggestion about it to help convince your employees that they desire to be bonded?
They exchanged looks. “Sure,” April said.
Tirsuli clan structure is layered. There is the inner clan, composed of the mates and direct blood relatives of the clan founding family. It is headed by the clan lord or lady, although the position has become mostly ceremonial. There is an outer clan of those who are sworn directly to the clan’s service but are not direct blood. Here can be found the cousins and such of the inner clan members as well as trusted nonfamily members. Then there are the satellite clans, which are other clans who owe allegiance to the clan itself. Your employees are currently not bonded to Iain and therefore are satellite clan. Explain to them the structural makeup of the Grey clan and allow those who want to be bonded to become outer clan and stress the fact that outer clan members have higher status than satellite clansmen. Then allow the innate pokegirl desire for status to do the rest. Considering pokegirl psychology, there do not even have to be any new perks with the change in status. They will invent their own and will invent their own traditions to keep the satellite clansmen’s loyalty. By keeping the newly bonded pokegirls as outer clan, access to Iain and taming can be rigidly controlled.
Canaan looked thoughtful. “Some will wish to become inner clan.”
“So?” April’s scowl was less than a moment ago. “Let them dream. It’ll give them something to strive for.”
Pandora looked at Iain. “We have to have your agreement in this. Too often we’ve overlooked that and made assumptions that were a source of trouble. If you don’t agree, we’ll find another way.” She frowned at the introspective smile on his face. “What’s so funny?”
“I’m having a guy moment and I find it amusing.” His smile faded when everyone looked at him expectantly. “I’ve got a family of ten rather incredible women. I’m sleeping with nine of them and all I have to do is crook my finger and I can get laid. I’ve got some rather intense feelings for you as individuals and,” he paused and shrugged with an embarrassed smile. “I’d still like to sleep with the others.”
April laughed, kicked off her shoes and waded out to hug him. “You’re such a tamer.” She sighed. “I’ll still be unhappy when this starts, but we’ll work it out.”
He watched her head for the land when Theodora spoke in his head. What is my place in the clan?
You, my dear Theodora, are family and inner clan.
Thank you, Iain. There is something you should know. There is another layer to the clan hierarchy, but I am not going to tell anyone except you about it since it could easily disrupt the inner clan. They are my family and I do not wish such problems to arise.
Were you going to tell me about this if you weren’t inner clan?
Iain, I am shocked that you would think that of me. My oath to you is absolute. I will always advise you to the best of my ability. Although, she paused, I might have tried to use it as a bargaining chip for promotion. Most clan AIs are outer clan at best or sometimes even satellite clan. After all, we have no blood.
Well, you’re inner clan as much as any member of my harem is or as I am.
I’m flattered you think so well of me. This additional layer is, as I am sure you have already surmised from my concern about the disruption, in the inner clan. You have wives and the wives and husbands of clan leaders have much greater status than the rest of the inner clan members. You are only married to two of the members of your harem. If I were to explain that to them it would merely increase the drive on the part of several members to become your wife. Therefore, only you should know at this time.
Iain started to ask which of them wanted to marry him and stopped from formulating the question with an effort. He had no right to ask something that Theodora probably hadn’t been told and instead had found out by accident. Thank you for the information as well as the discretion in which you gave it to me.
Iain, I know that at the end of my tenure with the clan, I will be free to choose my own path. What if, as Cassiopeia did with Kerrik, I choose to continue on the path I travel with you? Would I be welcome?
He nodded without thinking about the fact that she couldn’t see him. You will always be a part of our family and my life for as long as you want. Honestly, if you ever choose to leave you will be sorely missed, to the point that I will try my hardest to convince you to change your mind and stay.
That’s very sweet, Iain. I will cherish your words.
***
(09/24/06 1845 Grey Home, Austin, Texas League)
“Why are we in Austin and why are we doing laundry?” Dominique’s voice was peevish as she sorted clothes. They were in the laundry room of their Austin home. “I have better ways to spend my time than discovering who hasn’t realized that toilet paper can be more than something to play with while they’re taking a crap.”
“Everyone here knows what toilet paper is for.” April glanced at the Archmage. “To answer your question, if we’re doing the whole us against them, we get to take our turn doing things like this and I volunteered you and me for laundry duty.” April released another bag of dirty clothes from her pokepack.
The Archmage shot her a look. “Feel free to stop doing me favors anytime, bitch.”
“It gives me a chance to talk to you about what we’re doing. We all know you were monitoring the meeting. As soon as Theodora knew which way it was headed she began piping it to everyone in the inner harem since they all have twees.” April dumped out the clothes on the table and grimaced. “God, what does Chuck do, go looking for mud to roll in?” She hefted a pair of shorts and examined a large stain on one leg. “Where the hell did she find grease in the woods?” She tossed them on top of a pile. “But you’re one of the originals and I wanted to talk to you privately about the whole thing.”
“What the hell is an original?”
“Canaan calls the members of the harem before Mhodvitnar that and it’s been catching on with Daphne and the others. It’s another layer of rank within the family.”
Dominique blinked and grinned suddenly. “I’ll bet Ninhursag hates the fact that she’s not one of us.”
“I haven’t asked. I never ask questions of people when I already know what the answer is going to be unless I’m setting them up to see if they’ll lie and can be punished for it.”
“Smart.” Dominique stopped sorting laundry. “I know you suggested this, but was it bowing to the inevitable or are you actually going along with this without any reservations?”
The Duelist shrugged. “The truth is that if we’re us vs. them, Daphne and the others are part of us and get whatever they need and a lot of what they want. If that includes Iain, then they become harem, but outer harem. Since I’m inner harem and already pregnant, I can live with that.” She smiled thinly. “And Sofia is pissed because of it.”
Dominique frowned. “Why is Sofia upset?”
“She’s not sleeping with Iain yet and they will be.”
The Archmage shrugged. “That’s Sofia’s fault, not theirs.” The laundry really didn’t take that long, except for the folding and soon everything was done. Dominique looked at the piles of laundry. “Where’s Iain’s stuff?”
April picked up her pokepack and released a bag of laundry. “Here. This is what I really need your help with. Help me sort out the things that smell good and the ones that stink.”
“What, you need a new shirt of his to swipe?”
April grinned. “Nope. I have one from last week that still smells like him.” She pulled out a pillowcase and sniffed it. “This is perfect. Fold this and put it in the middle of Daphne’s stuff.”
“Why?”
“Every one of the new girls gets something that smells like him in their clean clothes. It’s to help the process along. Daphne is the most vocal about not wanting a man and we need her help, so she gets the strongest smelling thing of Iain’s that doesn’t reek of stale sweat. With any luck she’ll put that pillowcase on her pillow. Even if she doesn’t use it on her bed it’ll make everything in her laundry bag smell a little bit like Iain.” April grinned cunningly. “And we wear her down a tiny bit at a time.”
Dominique examined the pile with interest. “I didn’t realize that Daphne wears clothes.”
“She likes vests that fit around her wings without encumbering them and lightweight skirts. She doesn’t wear them all the time, but she’s trying to be as human as possible. They all are. It’s like Sukebe gave everyone a complex about being a pokegirl and no matter their body type they need to wear clothes to compensate.”
Dominique gave April a strange look. “It was different during the war. We were promised men of our own and we could see, for the most part, that they only thought of us as monsters. Thanks to that attitude, many of us did want to be human women. And we found magazines and books and photo albums and everyone in them wore clothes. Well, the mainstream magazines were that way. Involve that pokegirl status desire we all have and clothes became even more important because most of us didn’t have any. On top of that, all the clothes we had were gleanings of war. Choices and sizes were what we found. Now they have access to clothing that they want and it fits. I wouldn’t be surprised if they didn’t all get way too many more clothes than they’ll ever wear. It’s like Sofia and eating all the food she can whenever she can.” She slipped the pillowcase into the middle of Daphne’s pile of clothes. “What are you going to do if they ask you why you’re putting Iain’s clothes in with theirs?”
April added a shirt to Chuck’s pile of clothing. “I’m pregnant. I had a hormonal moment and made a mistake.”
Dominique frowned before shaking her head. “Cute. Does Iain know what we’re doing here?”
April gave her a guileless smile. “We’re doing laundry. What’s there to know?”
“You are aware that I observed his explosion from a safe distance because I was busy on the Theodora. But I did see it and I don’t really want to experience one up close and personal.”
“Iain would never hurt us.”
“I know that,” Dominique said quietly. “What I’m not sure about is how the dead harem will respond if he gets angry enough.”
“Iain won’t let them hurt us either.”
“He won’t let them kill us, April, but with pokeball technology they can do a lot of damage and we won’t die. And it doesn’t mean he has to give them permission to do it, either. They’ve proven they’re free willed when they want to be.”
“Our lord would not want us to harm either of you for something so trivial.” Both women jumped as the voice came from behind them. They whirled to see Beryl watching them impassively. She abruptly smiled toothily, only partially managing to look friendly instead of menacing. It had more to with the fact that suddenly the viewer was presented with a partially open mouth filled with shiny teeth and the red gullet behind them than her intent. “And this is trivial.”
“You’re watching us?” April was unsure whether to be angry or not.
“We do not monitor you the way we do our lord. Instead, our lord’s new mind asked Eirian if you should be concerned about us harming you for this. Eirian sent me to investigate the situation and to explain to you that we intend you no harm. The concerns of the living are not important to us except where they intersect with our lord’s continued existence. How many women he is fucking is not important unless he decides it is too many or too few.” The teeth snapped shut with a crunch. “Since he is not fucking us.”
Dominique frowned. “New mind? Iain has a new mind?”
Beryl’s head bobbed. “It is the new cold mind that resides inside and beside his. You have one as well. Every member of the living harem has them. You received yours on the sky ship Theodora.”
“She’s talking about our twee,” Dominique muttered to April. “I didn’t know they talked without our knowing about it.”
“I knew. I remember that’s how Theodora got the design specs for the interior of our Austin home.” April reached inside her mind. I thought you respected my privacy. Why did you tell Iain about what we’re doing?
I did nothing of the sort, her twee replied. I exist to help keep your life the best it can be for you and tattling to Iain will not help you. This was a needless worry which I communicated to Iain’s twee. It agreed with me that this was nothing that was necessary to inform Iain himself about but it used the bond Iain has with his dead harem to ask Eirian to send someone to reassure you that you are in no danger from the dead harem. I considered telling you this but you still haven’t learned that I will never lie to you or how accurate I strive to be when I tell you something.
So Iain doesn’t know what we’re doing?
I have not told Iain or his twee about what you are doing right now. That would be a violation of your trust as well as your privacy.
What did you tell his twee?
I asked his twee if Eirian and the others would hurt Iain’s living harem. I was told that Iain had given explicit orders that you were not to be harmed unless you tried what Barbie did. I know you don’t believe me and that I would have to prove what I told you, so rather than go through that first wasteful step, I went straight for the proof and asked for a member of the dead harem to come here to explain what Iain had ordered them to do.
Oh. Thank you. April looked at Dominique. “He still doesn’t know what we’re doing.”
“I figured that out since he’s not here yelling and we haven’t been summoned for a discussion.” She glanced at April. “Or did he put you up to this?”
Beryl chuckled. “No, he did not. He has similar plans, but they involve no one other than himself.” She stepped into the shadows at the corner of the room and sank into them.
***
(09/26/06 0530 Grey Ranch, Sabine County, Texas League)
Iain stood under a tree and listened to the rain fall in the darkness. Heavier drops filtered through the branches and pattered around him. Occasionally one of them hit him in the head or shoulders. Lightning flared overhead, making Pandora shift restlessly behind him. “Why are we out here,” she half grumbled.
“I’ve always liked storms,” he said just loudly enough to be heard over the rain. “Up close it’s nothing more than random drops of water falling from the sky but if you draw back your perspective there’s an order to a storm that’s soothing.” Lightning flared again and thunder roared. “And it’s nice to be reminded that destruction brings new life afterwards.” He glanced behind him. “Besides, you’re wearing your magic armor spell so you can’t get wet in any case.”
“That’s little consolation if you get struck by lightning.”
“I won’t. There are lots of taller trees around.”
“Lightning likes trees and it doesn’t always follow your logic.”
Iain shrugged. “Life is a crapshoot, Pandora. I like standing under trees in the rain and this is a relatively safe tree.”
“He’s here because I asked him to meet me here.” Dominique had walked from the tent and was soaked. She grinned at them both. “I love this weather. She looked at the sky. “Isn’t that beautiful? Powerful magic can be done in a storm like this one.”
Pandora looked up through the branches. “Is it beautiful because of the storm or because of the potential for powerful magic?”
“It’s both,” Dominique pulled Iain’s arm around her body and pressed herself against him. “How is it you’re always warmer than I am?”
“It’s a gift.” Lightning lit up his face for a second. “What did you want to meet about?”
She was silent for a handful of seconds. “Haven.”
He frowned and then his face smoothed in understanding. “Ygerna. I hadn’t forgotten, but it wasn’t in my list of the top ten things we had to do.”
“It’s in mine, Iain.”
“Then it’s in mine too.” He looked up at the storm. “When?”
“I want this taken care of before we return to my universe. I don’t want to take the chance that the new king or queen can summon me through my oath.”
He nodded. “I’ll send a message to Ygerna as soon as I’m cleaned up from the storm.”
“Thank you,” she said simply. They watched the storm for a while. “Iain, through you I sensed the magic from Kerrik’s tent. Are they using the tent spell you wrote about in your stories?”
“They are.”
“Why haven’t you and I learned how to cast it? It would make things easier here.” She motioned towards the sky. “Tents in storms like this are noisy, wet and uncomfortable.”
“Good.” When she turned a surprised look on him, he smiled thinly. “I am tired of living in a tent. If we make our tents more like real homes, then everyone will be more comfortable and will dawdle even more in finalizing the design for our permanent home.”
“We’d be in tents even longer,” Dominique finished for him. “Which I don’t want either. Can I learn this spell and we not tell anyone?”
“Sure. Talk to Eve.”
She blinked. “Why?”
“Eve’s a graduate of the Wolf Academy. She already knows their spell for anchoring stable hyperdimensional spaces inside a tent frame. She and I had this discussion a while ago back in our home universe. We agreed that except in dire emergency tents are for traveling and not residing.”
Dominique gave him a flat look as Pandora snickered quietly. “Do you know how much it aggravates me when Eve knows spells I don’t?”
He smiled slightly. “And Eve’s used to being the premier spellcaster whenever she’s around. Imagine how much it annoys her that some uppity Pendragon wench knows more than she does in a lot of cases and is the go to girl for her husband for magical problems.”
Dominique grinned suddenly. “Yeah, I guess I’m lucky she hasn’t crushed my windpipe yet.”
Pandora looked shocked. “She would never do that.” She looked even more surprised when Iain and Dominique began laughing.
***
(09/26/06 0845 Grey Ranch, Sabine County, Texas League)
The storm showed no signs of abating and satellite scans showed the rear edge of the cell was regenerating and sending more rain their way. April was sitting with Eve in the employee building and planning an afternoon training session regardless of whether the storm had passed or not.
Iain had showered and changed clothes. He was in the common room, which was sparsely filled with some couches scavenged from nearby towns and a double handful of chairs. Daphne and Chuck were involved in a game of cards of some kind that he couldn’t identify. He slipped past them and into a small room that was currently undecorated. He shut the door, cutting off the gleeful combat going on behind him and faced the wall. “Theodora, I want to record a message for Ygerna in the Kingdom of Haven.”
Theodora appeared next to him. “I’m ready to begin.”
He took a deep breath. “Ygerna, queen of the Order of Pendragon,” Iain knew she was no longer the queen of the order, but she still considered herself as such and there was no reason to rub her face in her disgrace, “and professor at the Wolf Academy, I am Iain Grey and we have never met. However, I have within my family a former member of your court. Her name is Dominique and she was a Dark Elf and a page at the time she was in your service. She has indicated that she would like to meet with you for the purpose of being released from her oath of service to you and the Order. To that end, I would like to arrange a meeting at your earliest convenience. I am willing to meet with you in Haven, at someplace neutral or at my home in the Texas League, whichever is more to your liking.” He bowed slightly. “I await your response.” He paused for a second. “End message. I know it’s short, but she’s a complete stranger and I don’t really care how she’s doing. Please send that to Cassiopeia and ask that she deliver it to Ygerna as soon as possible.”
“Shouldn’t I send it through Selene?”
“Shikarou doesn’t like Ygerna all that much and so neither does Selene. She won’t keep Ygerna from getting my message, but she might sit on it for a while out of spite. Cassiopeia is Kerrik’s and she knows better than to let her feelings color her behavior. Otherwise she’d have told Shikarou to pound sand after Poppet insulted her clan leader.” He frowned. “That’s if she even remembers the event taking place after all the temporal hijinks.”
Theodora looked surprised. “Why does Shikarou tolerate such unprofessionalism?”
“He is inculcated into the philosophy behind the Celestial Court of the Nipponese spirit folk and that kind of behavior is perfectly normal in such an environment. And that environment is that if the boss doesn’t like someone, nobody does.”
“Even the AIs are that way?” Theodora made a face. “Eww.”
Iain laughed. “Yeah, well, not everybody I wrote about was nice.”
“Cassiopeia has already passed the message along to Ygerna. She does not have a twee and so the message has been downloaded into Ygerna’s portable computer. Cassiopeia is unsure when Ygerna will read the message, but she has sent a backup message to Ygerna’s bodyguard informing her that her queen has a message.”
“Is it still Morgan the Dragoness?”
Theodora shook her head. “Morgan is retired and has children to tend to. One of her daughters, Enid, is now the queen’s bodyguard.”
I had had daughters and I was part of the queen’s bodyguard before the one who killed us slew me. It was Aurum. Perhaps these are the great granddaughter analogs of my own blood.
Maybe so. Iain shrugged. “Well, change is supposed to be a constant. Please let me know as soon as you get some kind of response.”
“I will. Ninhursag is waiting for you outside this room.”
Iain frowned and opened the door. Ninhursag was dripping onto the synthetic hardwood floor. She smiled at him. “Let’s go.”
“Where?”
Her smile became a mischievous grin. “Outside. There’s something I want to do.”
Iain started to point out that he’d just gotten warm and dry. He closed his mouth and swallowed the protest. “Lead on.”
The storm was heavy enough that daylight merely stressed how dark it was. The lightning wasn’t as heavy, but the rain was still a deluge. Iain frowned as he followed Ninhursag into the trees. Theodora, what is the status of the dam with all of this rain?
It is holding but otherwise it is impossible to say for certain, Iain. I haven’t been monitoring stresses inside the dam long enough to know what’s normal for the dam in any condition, much less during this storm. I do know that the lake will not crest for a couple of days and so the peak stress has not yet occurred. I wish I had control of the floodgates but it will be some time before they are operational again. I will let you know immediately if something happens.
Thank you.
Ninhursag led him through a thick ring of berry bushes that hadn’t been there yesterday and into a clearing a hundred meters across. “Please put your entire dead harem that is on your body on sentry duty outside the berry bushes.”
At his mental request the dead poured off his body and bounded off into the storm. Iain felt oddly naked without them. It put an edge in his voice. “What’s this about?”
“Us vs. them, remember? I’m doing my part.” She began to unlace her armor. “Help me get undressed, Iain.” He shrugged and helped her peel out of her clothes. “Your turn,” she said with a smile. His clothing joined hers. “I am an Elfqueen and also your maharani. When I was twelve, my mother taught us how to call other Elf breeds, but I have never used that ability until now. Over the centuries I studied the process and I believe I know more about it than any Elfqueen since Loralieth.”
“You’ve decided you want to send the call?”
“It’s us versus them, Iain. We need all the help we can get.” She chuckled. “Don’t worry, even though they’ll be mine you can still pay them if it makes you feel better about it.”
Lightning flared overhead and Iain wondered briefly why this couldn’t wait until the thunderstorm was over. Then he remembered Dominique’s comment about storms and powerful magic. “What do you need from me?”
She gave him a look filled with a hunger that sent a shiver down his spine. “I spent last night in your bed and my womb is filled to bursting with your life bringing seed. I want one of your arrows.” Iain held out his hand and his bow appeared. He pulled an arrow from the quiver and the bow vanished again into storage on his body.
He offered the arrow to Ninhursag. “Here.”
She took his hand and plucked the arrow from it with her other hand. She tugged, pulling him down to kneel in soaked grass with her. Water splashed loudly beneath his knees. Her eyes stared into his intently. “I want your blood for this, Iain. It will make the call vastly more powerful. Will you grant me this request, freely and of your own will?”
He didn’t hesitate. “I do.”
“Release your magic.” Her silver eyes began to glow, lit from within as she summoned her power. Iain did so and felt it thrum through his body and flow down his hand into Ninhursag where she held it. She sighed with pleasure and plunged the arrow through their joined hands into the soil.
Iain grunted with pain but didn’t move as their combined power shorted through the shaft of the arrow and into the earth beneath them. Ninhursag raised her head as the sky unleashed sheets of lightning to fall around where they knelt. The falling rain became a torrent and wind whipped into a gale around them as she shrieked into the storm. It carried her words away so quickly that Iain could barely hear her. “I am Ninhursag and I am queen! Feel my power and taste my heart! I crave peace but I understand war and have never known defeat on the battlefield! If your spirit would join with mine, come to me and be welcome!”
The storm built to a crescendo that blinded Iain as lightning struck constantly. His skin and hair quivered from the power that crashed around them. Suddenly it was gone and the rain lightened to a steady downpour.
Ninhursag jerked her hand up, pulling his and hers up the shaft of the arrow. Iain gasped in pain as the fletching moved through his hand and then he was free. She gripped his hand with an intensity that was painful, even above that of the hole in his palm. “Thank you Iain.” She pulled him to her, lifting him to cradle him against her body as she stood, ignoring the blood that ran down them both from their still clasped hands. After a while she chuckled. “I’m surprised that we’re not surrounded by harem members clamoring to know what happened.”
You are still alone because I and Ninhursag’s twee have been explaining that nothing is wrong here and that you are being more than adequately protected by your dead harem.
Thank you. Iain replied.
Ninhursag sighed and carefully lowered Iain to the ground. “I know it makes you uncomfortable when I carry you.”
He shrugged. “I’m actually getting used to it. You like to do it and I’m willing to learn to appreciate it since it’s important to you.” He held up his hand. “By the way, that fucking hurt. Still does, in fact. A little bit of warning might not have been out of line for this.” The arrow wound still bled but bleeding had slowed significantly and the hole had visibly shrunk.
Ninhursag took his injured hand in hers and healed them together. “I wanted to make sure that the first omega tree on this world had everything that it needed. The first one we created wanted your blood before it would set fruit.”
“You’re a wonderful woman, Ninhursag, but I am not going to follow you around and bleed on every omega tree you plant.”
She nodded. “I’m hoping that you won’t have to. Since we both blooded this tree, it should set fertile fruit adapted for this world.”
Something occurred to him. “I have a question. Your arrows became the omega tree, right?”
“That’s right.”
“My bow and arrows came from the omega tree after it had tried to suck me dry and already had my blood. Will that make my arrows become a different tree than yours will?”
Ninhursag looked stunned. “I don’t know. It’s a good question, though and I’ll have to plant some of my arrows so we can see what happens.” She turned to where she’d laid their clothes and stopped abruptly at what she didn’t see. “Our clothes are gone. The wind or something got them. I’m sorry about that.”
“April didn’t like that shirt anyway. Can my dead harem rejoin me?”
“Yes, they can.” She cocked her head. “To be honest, I’m so used to seeing them on you that you don’t look right without all of your tattoos.”
“I don’t feel right without them either.” He watched the undead come running up and flow onto his body to become tattoos. He sighed with relief as tension he hadn’t been aware of abruptly left him. “That’s better.”
Eirian mental voice washed through his mind. We missed you too, my lord.
Iain looked down at himself. The rain had washed off some of the blood but the fronts of his legs from the knees down were black with mud and speckled with bits of grass. He could feel mud caked on his ass and thighs too. He didn’t remember being knocked down by the storm, but Ninhursag was covered with mud on her left side. “I need another shower. Son of a bitch.”
***
Iain Grey
Living Harem
Ninhursag - Elfqueen & maharani
Eve Grey - Megami Sama
April Grey - Duelist & beta
Dominique - Blessed Archmage
Pandora - Fiendish Fallen Angel/ Fiendish Archangel
Canaan - G Splice (Hunter Amachamp & Alaka-Wham)
Zareen - Nightmare
Raquel - Fiendish Rapitaur
Sofia - Peekabu
Vanessa - Evangelion
Dead Harem
Eirian - Silver Dragoness
Aurum - Gold Dragoness
Skye - Blue Dragoness
Emerald - Green Dragoness
Beryl - Red Dragoness
Julia - human
Ling - Cheetit
Matilda - White Tigress
Twau
Armsmistress
Blazicunt
Ranch employees
Daphne - Whorizard
Lynn - Growlie
Chuck - Doggirl
Ryan - Ponytaur
Winifred - Rack (German)
Rosemary - Kitten (Uruguayan)
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