Chapter 30

 

            Eve looked up from the vegetables she’d been cutting for lunch when Iain came into the kitchen. “We need to go to the alpha site in the Dark Continent.”

            She blinked. “What on earth for?”

            “Damage control.” He grimaced. “We need to inform Kirabo that Irena and Montsho are dead before she finds out from some other source and wants to know why we didn’t tell her about it immediately. I think I’ve got a way to do it that will actually help us.”

            The Megami-sama put the knife she’d been using down and moved the vegetables to a bowl. “This I want to see. Are we visiting her?”

            “Fuck no. Getting within arm’s reach of her right now is not a good idea. I’m sending her a message.”

            She covered the bowl and used the wand of the pokepack hanging on the wall to digitize the bowl and put it into stasis. “Let me get the others. We’ll meet outside in ten minutes.”

            “Works for me.”

            Iain headed outside and dropped his pack onto the bench before settling down next to it. He looked over the garden where they’d started breaking up the hard ground from the fire and swallowed hard. “You’d have liked what I’m going to do, Montsho. I plan to be very sneaky today.”

            “Does it help?” Vanessa moved his pack and sat next to him. “Talking to the dead has never really done anything for me.”

            “Before I came here I’d have said it probably doesn’t really have any effect, but since then I’ve found out that the undead are real. That suggests the dead might be more along the lines of what I’ve seen in fiction too, and they might like to be talked to even if they can’t reply.”

            “What are you doing that’s sneaky?”

            “I’ve got to inform Kirabo that Irena and Montsho are dead. If I wait, she’s likely to be upset at us when she does find out. So, we’re headed to the Dark Continent to record the message so I don’t have my pokedex on for long.”

            She nodded. “Can I come along?”

            “Are you trying to be more of a part of our family?”

            Vanessa hesitated for several seconds. “I want to. I still can’t help you against Sanctuary or catastrophe will result, but damn it, Iain, this is my home now.” She halfway glared at him. “With you.” She looked away. “With them, your women.” A tiny smile appeared. “Even with April, although she hates me.”

            “Do you love him?” It was April.

            Vanessa turned on the bench and met her gaze. “I don’t know. I don’t know if I can love. I know I want to be here, with you and him and the others. Isn’t that enough?”

            “No, it’s not.” April put her hand on Vanessa’s shoulder. “But it’ll do for now. Will you kill for him?”

            There was no hesitation. “Yes. And for him I will kill for you, too.”

            “I can live with that.”

            “Would you kill for me?”

            April shook her head. “No, not for you, but I will kill for the children that you carry. Since you’re their life support system right now, I have to keep you safe too.”

            Vanessa smiled. “Like you just said, I can live with that.”

            “And you’re wrong. I don’t hate you, Evangelion. I don’t like what’s happened, and I suppose I’ve been taking that out on you. You shouldn’t be here, you shouldn’t be pregnant and it shouldn’t have happened with Iain. He is supposed to be mine and ours, not yours.” Her voice began to rise and she stopped to take a deep breath. “Will you be coming with us to One?”

            Vanessa looked startled. “I hadn’t thought about that.”

            “You’d better. We’re not staying until the kits are born and grown up, especially since nobody knows how long that will take.”

            Vanessa looked at Iain. “Will you let me come to this new world if I wish to?”

            “Of course I will.”

            “Then I’d like to come with you.”

            “Then maybe you’d better start acting more like this is your family and less like it’s where you sleep at night, Vanessa.” Eve stopped next to Iain.

            He took his wife’s hand. “We were just discussing that and she intends to.”

            “Good. When we get back she can start helping with the chores. The dishes need washed and you’re elected, Vanessa. Don’t worry; you’ll have plenty of time after your training to work on your gardens.”

            Vanessa blinked. “Training? You think I need to train?”

            “You might. I don’t know how much combat you’ve been in recently but what I really want is for you to help train us. Whatever techniques and tips you can pass on would be very welcome. And Iain and I need as complete a briefing on the world situation as you can give. After all, you legendaries do have a private club.”

            “Not like you think. Most of them don’t like each other nearly as much as they don’t like the mortals. There are cliques, too, and we don’t cross those boundaries. I will, however, tell you what I can.”

            Iain gave them all an exasperated look. “Can we go to the Dark Continent now? I do have some sneakiness to pull off and I don’t want to try to do it here.” A second later they were standing at the alpha site. “Thank you. Feel free to go back to your discussion while I’m off sneaking.”

            Dominique grinned. “No, I want to see this.”

            “Then sit down and be quiet.” Iain pulled his Austin Drummond pokedex from his pack and turned it on. While it was going through its startup cycle he changed his appearance to that of Austin.

            Vanessa, who had never seen this before, gaped. “That’s very smooth.”

            “Thanks. I wish I dared to make myself taller or something, but I’m scared I won’t be able to do it right and I’ll end up lopsided or worse. Still, unless they know I can do this, they won’t be expecting it.”

            He activated the record function and gave the time and date. “I know we talked to you a few days ago but you wanted us to contact you if there was news about Kerrik Wolf.” His face became grim. “He found us yesterday and attacked with his harem, catching us by surprise. We managed to flee, but not before he killed several members of my harem, including Irena and Montsho. I know that the fact that I am no longer with Irena means if I wanted to disappear I could and you’d never find me again, but that kattle fucker is going to pay for what he did and so I’m going to keep hunting him until I can get my hands on him. I’ll also keep sending you information on him, and if you get to him before I do, I want a piece of him.” He frowned. “He likes to gloat. Something he said suggested he has some way to locate Sanctuary Goths and that he found us by tracking Irena. I don’t know if that’s true or not, but if so it may be better for my chances of killing him that I don’t have another Sanctuary Goth running around with me. That and I do miss her.” His teeth showed in a silent snarl. “After we finish healing up I’ll be taking a couple of weeks to add to my harem and do some specialized training. Then I’m going to hunt that bastard down and finish this. Thanks to firsthand experience I have a better idea of how his bitches fight and that gives me an edge. I intend to use that to cut him to pieces. When I get him, I’ll bring you a piece as proof. Austin Drummond out.” He stopped the recording and set it up to send to Peony and Captain Lisa. Then he turned the pokedex off.

            Dominique was watching him with something very much like awe in her eyes. “You want her to keep your access to the council building current and she will so you can bring her that piece of Kerrik. That’s ingenious.”

            “I hope so.” He swapped the Drummond pokedex with the Wolf one. “But I still have one more message to send.” While the Wolf pokedex was booting he changed his appearance back to his own. His hair lengthened and a shaggy beard appeared on his face. Then he closed his eyes. Slowly his shirt changed from brown to forest green and his blue jeans darkened until they looked nearly new. He started the pokedex. “Minister Harris, this is Kerrik.” He scratched the beard idly. “I wanted to touch base with you and give you a bit of news. I’ve been hitting some Sanctuary Goths here in Blue that aren’t on your radar and yesterday I ran across something new. The Goth I found had a Tyrannodame with her instead of any of the other dinosaur pokegirls and a harem of pretty standard girls. It was a bit of nasty shock, I will admit. I still killed the Tyrannodame and her, but her human pet got away with some of her remaining harem. My harem got chewed up too badly to pursue, so he’s still out there somewhere.” He grinned. “I just thought you might want to know. Anytime you want to cough up that ebony stone, feel free to call.” He stopped the recording and turned the dex off.

            April sat down next to him and tugged on the beard. “I don’t like this. Make it go away.”

            “I am not going to try to grow hair backwards just yet and if I kill it at the skin I’ll be bald. Get some scissors and a razor so we can do this the old fashioned way.”

            Her eyes lit up. “I get to shave you? I’ll be right back.” She eagerly headed for her pokepack.

            Eve laughed at the suddenly worried look that appeared on his face. He glanced at her. “How is it she has a shaving kit already?”

            The Megami-sama smirked. “She used to shave her previous tamer and kept it as a memento. It’s a sign of great trust to allow someone else that close to you with a straight razor.”

            His eyebrows shot up. “Straight razor? Crap.”

            “You already said yes. Don’t worry, if anything happens I can always grow your nose back.” Her smile widened. “And since you made that beard part of your Kerrik Wolf persona, you might want to just let her shave you every day so you can be used to it.”

            “Double crap.”

            She looked over where April was searching the index of her pokepack. “Iain, you just made her very happy.”

            “I did, didn’t I? Well, I guess she gets to shave me from now on.”

            Dominique frowned. “Exactly how much of you is she going to shave? It might not be his nose you have to grow back, Eve.”

            Vanessa dissolved into laughter as Iain’s worry reappeared.

 

***

 

            Iain sighed and pulled the wooden box towards him in order to look inside again. Unsurprisingly, nothing had changed. There was still the heavy envelope sealed with red wax in the shape of a circle quartered by a cross and a data stick for a player or pokedex.

            He picked up the envelope and turned it over in his hands. With his perception, he could read the contents without opening it. He wasn’t sure where the illumination to read came from, but wasn’t going to look a gift horse in the mouth. A typewritten note on the top explained that the document was the formula for a spell that opened dimensional portals. The rest was handwritten and was exactly what the note had said it would be. He reached out with his mind. April, Dominique, Eve, I’m going to listen to Micah’s message. Would you like to be here for it?

            April’s mind touched his. You should ask Vanessa too. She’s with me, can I invite her?

            You’re right, so please do.

            He settled back in his chair and waited until all of them had filed in. Vanessa gave him a quick smile. “Thank you for letting me sit in on this.”

            “Thank April. She reminded me that you’re family now.”

            The legendary looked surprised and turned to April. “Thank you very much.”

            The Duelist shrugged. “It’s time to bury the hatchet between us.”

            Eve handed him a large goblet before sitting down next to Dominique. He sniffed it and looked in to see the dark velvet redness of wine. “What, no tea?”

            She shook her head. “I think you need something a bit stronger right now.”

            He took a sip and savored the flavor. “Thanks. I think you’re right.” Then he put the goblet down and took the data stick from the box.

            The player on his desk had been opened up to make sure it didn’t have any transmission capabilities and he slotted the stick into it without any hesitation. The player finished loading and he pressed play.

            Micah was wearing a charcoal grey shirt and dark wool pants that were a bit incongruous against the leathery wings and black horns framing his blond hair and white face. He smiled. “Good evening, morning, or whatever time this message might find you, Kerrik. Thankfully, Macavity has stayed well away from me, and I’d be quite happy if I never saw her, period. Sexebi told me the exact how that she got hold of this message to give to me, and from the way she remarked about things, it seemed to imply that Evangelion isn’t just hanging around to raid your refrigerator.”

            Dominique snickered softly as Micah’s smile deepened. “Assuming this is the case, I hope the two of you are enjoying yourselves, and that she’s getting along wonderfully with all the other ladies in your life. If she’s not...” He chuckled and dipped his wings in a shrug. “I can only chide her for not having good taste in manflesh, or something.”

            Iain pressed the pause button as wood creaked loudly. Vanessa gave him a slightly embarrassed look and released the arm of the couch. “Sorry about that.”

            “It’s ok. He’s not from around here and doesn’t know that tweaking a legendary is supposed to be more terrifying than facing a Widow naked. I didn’t either, which is why you’re here now.”

            She blinked and started laughing. “You’re right. His temerity surprised me but I shouldn’t really care, should I? I’ll remember he’s like you in many ways should we ever meet.”

            “Please do. He might end up being a fast friend for the family.” Iain pressed play again.

            On the screen, Micah rubbed his clean shaven chin as a grin flashed. “Thanks for the ‘horny’ comment, by the way. Congratulations, that’s the first comment of that type I’ve gotten. Thankfully, I haven’t had to deal with hordes coming after me with torches and pitchforks, but I haven’t exactly been interacting with people at large.” He gave another tiny shrug and folded his fingers over his stomach. “Thankfully, I’m a bit of an anti-social bastard, so it hasn’t really affected me all that much. Hell, I pretty much stayed away from others even before I had my little...” He glanced over his shoulder at a wing. “Incident.”

            He continued. “I’ll confess, I’m a little surprised as to the method you discovered my current madness. I had actually considered going to Devon Harris to try and beg a ride over to more harmless climes for about, oh, five seconds, before common sense reasserted itself. I can only hope that Devon finally got out of that ‘teenage asshole’ period that all creatures go through in that span of time. Even if he has, I doubt a meeting between him and I would go over all that well, but, such is life.”

            Micah let out a gust of a breath and a soft laugh before going on. “Speaking of Capital and Linda, I do feel that I need to apologize for ditching the Kite in your backyard, so to speak. That entire scenario I went through at Sadie Pokens was meant to deal with another case of Sanctuary going after my ass, but, well, things got away from me, and... I had originally intended to dump the Kite in... what, the Ruby League? Edo? One of those. But considering the entire reason Linda and her brood were going after my ass was effectively to track you down to ask you not to kill them, pretty please, with sugar on top... Anyways. I suppose what they were fearing is that you had a set of wolf ears atop your head and were going to pop up shortly thereafter to discuss things in detail.” Another gust of breath. “Considering by that point of my own additions, I guess that’s not too out there a worry. The reason I dumped the Kite in the Blue League was the hope that everyone involved would freak out at the idea of two Authors co-operating together, and what they could feasibly pull off. That would give me the cover to take care of a few things. I honestly didn’t expect you to get involved in that, but nothing’s perfect.”
            “Now,” Micah settled back in his seat, wings loosely spread around him. “By this point you’re aware of the fact that I’ve been evolving other pokegirls into Sanctuary Goths. You know of Bevin; Cologne and Yuuki are my other two paying customers, so to speak. I won’t give you an excuse for it,” he grinned faintly, “But I do feel that I should you give you the reasons. The long and short of it is that I’m attempting to introduce Sanctuary Goths en masse outside the Dark Continent, with the eventual hope that they’ll get infused into the overall breeding pool. The overarching point of this is to cure the ferality state. That, and from all the literature on the subject, Sanctuary Goths haven’t really been breeding with humans any. With enough luck, give it three generations or so and we may see new bloodgifts in males popping up, or normal girls thresholding into Sanctuary Goths, or thresholding into pokegirls that now have the anti-feral trait that Sanctuary Goths have. As I’ve been forced to remark several times, if I were fully capable of it, I’d turn all the pokegirls on the planet into Sanctuary Goths. This typically comes up in conversations where I remark that I’m not a god.” Micah rolled his eyes, his tone clearly exasperated. “I never thought I’d have a day where I’d have to defend myself from that label.”

            “I’m also making a horde of assumptions, as well; that the typical megalomania and grandiose superiority Sanctuary Goths exhibit is a trait of their society, and not the breed itself. If not...” Micah trailed off, and for a moment, his expression was haunted. He rubbed at his face. “If not, I suppose I’ll have to take care of it, won’t I? I’m not trying to change the world overall, but I can give enough people the right tools and a swift kick in the ass to punt them in the right direction.”

            Micah settled deeper into his chair. “As far as Sanctuary learning about them; quite frankly, I had planned for that. Either they’d accept it and resort to politicking regarding the matter, or they’d attempt a strike team to wipe them out and/or capture them. Both of which work to my advantage. Sanctuary still isn’t ready to start a war, and if I can show clearly that this is how they treat their allies of over a century...” He trailed off, giving a shrug, as if talking about however many people getting killed wasn’t a big deal. “And I’ll note for your Megami-sama, Eve, that Cologne, Yuuki, and Bevin are all big girls, and it’s not as if I forced them to accept my deal.”

            He rubbed the bridge of his nose. “What else, what else... Ah. Right. The method I’m utilizing to evolve pokegirls to Sanctuary Goths doesn’t require an Infinity Stone to act as a direct catalyst, though I still require equipment to pull it off. Right now I’m researching a spell method to accomplish the same in a method similar to a Celestial Blessing, though it’s taking longer than I had initially surmised. By the way, if you should ever visit Capital, please don’t react negatively to any Sanctuary Goths you should encounter, as I’ve captured the majority of Sanctuary-aligned S-Goths from said League. I’ve evolved a number of pokegirls to Sanctuary Goths, some of which are still in that League for one reason or another. As much as I’d like to put McMahon and all his buddies through a wall and tan Linda’s hide raw, I admit rather liking Capital for its relatively liberal treatment of pokegirls.” A sigh. “Go figure. I’ve also been in contact with a group of Sanctuary Goths from Sanctuary itself which actually did some honest-to-god -work to find me, and who don’t agree with Sanctuary’s policy at large. They’re good kids, at heart, albeit a little clueless on how to start a revolution. I don’t trust them completely, naturally, but they’ve helped me a little and I’ve done the same. I’m not sleeping with any of them, thank goodness, and if you’re curious, no, they don’t know
that I know you.”

            Micah smiled into the camera. “And now we get to the most terrifying part; my current plans for the future. I think it’s fair to say that we both have access to the Dark Continent. Congratulations on the Tyrannodame, by the way, and I hope she’s happy interacting with you and yours.” He took a deep breath. “I’ve already made the decision not to utilize tactics that would result in large swaths of the Dark Continent being rendered uninhabitable. Whether I’m taking the moral high ground or just being a blind fool, only time will tell. My long term plan involves the research of a method to wipe out Sanctuary’s leadership in one magical strike.”

            Off camera there came a high pitched “Eeep!”

            Micah glanced off to the side with a wry look and a half-smile on his face. “That, however,” he went on, refocusing on the recorder, “is my endgame. My current plans involve the systematic depopulation of the various small towns located on the Dark Continent. The purpose of that is a mostly psychological ploy; I’ll likely end up evolving all the captured pokegirls to Sanctuary Goths and releasing them whenever I leave this world through whatever methods.” One wing lifted in a half-shrug. “Baby steps.”

            He looked off to the side and his eyes widened slightly. “Cripes, this is taking a while.” He gave a slow shake of his horned head. “A few more things, then I’ll shut up. The Lucarda you know about; Illya is a Chibi-pokegirl, who effectively picked me at Sadie Pokens Day. Euphemia you mentioned; she’s a G-splice, and along with Nunnally, there’s a few oddities about their breed types that I’ll go into later. I’ve also picked up a few other women that I’m sleeping with; Otsana, a rather cute Gunnm who’s adjusting well enough to thresholding with some help from Ludmilla, my Dire Wolf, and a redheaded magic-using spitfire who claims her name is Lina Inverse, and that she’s -perfectly human-.” Micah’s smile was positively angelic as he spread his hands toward the camera. “Who am I to argue otherwise?”

            “As far as Nunnally and Euphemia go...” Micah’s expression was somber as he absently rubbed his hands together. “I can’t even begin to imagine what you’ve had to deal with, so I can’t exactly blame you for rambling. I’m not...” He trailed off. “Crap, how to put this. I...” His eyes closed. “Okay, one more time. I’ve pulled off some things in the past that are, quite frankly, a little disturbing whenever I examine them too closely.” He opened his eyes, the blue-on-black staring seriously into the camera. “Euphemia is a specific G-Splice that existed only in my story notes. Nunnally evolved into a specific pokegirl breed I call the ‘Arkhangelsk’. The problem is, it should have been impossible for Nunnally to evolve into said breed. Euphemia could be a co-incidence. Nunnally, not so much. The only common thread I can find between the two of them is me.”
            He gave a bark of laughter with more than a hint of hysteria in it. “I’ve made a lot of jokes about Authors being the equivalent of nascent protogodlings, but if this really is the case I’d love if someone gave me an owner’s manual to go along with the position!” A deep breath. “Putting that aside, the fact remains is that I’ve apparently been doing things without conscious decision or control. And that worries me. Something like that could very well come around to bite me on the ass. You haven’t mentioned anything similar, so I thought I’d mention it. If it’s just me, well... I’d probably feel a lot better, to be honest. But we’ll have to see.”

            He sat silently for a moment, rubbing his forehead as he thought. “Ah. One more thing. You mentioned offering a chance to travel to Pokegirl One, or the closest equivalent thereof, when everything was settled. If you’re anything like me,” he flashed a grin, “you’ve probably got a healthy dose of pride, stubbornness, and dislike of having to accept other people’s help. That said, I’ve got a lot of people to think about, and while I’ll gleefully stay well away from Cuba and Texas, when the time comes, I’ll gladly take your offer of transdimensional immigration.”

            “In that theme, I’m sending you along a gift.” Micah smiled. “I can only ask that your ladies respect the privacy of my gift and only allow you to be the one to open it and let others read it. I don’t know how useful it’ll be for you, but if nothing else, feel free to
pass a copy along to other authors you might encounter. It’ll be in a folder, sealed with a wax stamping of a circle quartered by a cross. If you’ve ever read any Susan Cooper, you’ll get the reference. As my handwriting is atrocious, I made sure to include a typed note saying what exactly the gift is.”
            Micah shook his head slowly. “I’ve talked enough. Goodbye and good luck, Kerrik. If you ever need help, don’t be afraid to call me. And I’ll make sure you’re out of the blast radius before I do anything that’ll be visible from orbit.” He leaned forward, reaching out to the recorder and the display went black.

            Iain stopped the message and tossed the player to Eve before picking up his goblet. “Questions, ladies?”

            “Of course we have questions.” April cocked her head. “Let’s start with the last first. Do you know the reference?”

            He smiled warmly. “Susan Cooper’s the Dark is Rising series is something that I still remember fondly. Will Stanton was somebody I could relate too, even if I wasn’t the seventh son of a seventh son. The circle quartered by the cross was the sign of the Light and is a symbol called a sun cross which predates Christianity. When we get to One, I’ll hunt up the series for you ladies and for our children.”

            “What do you think is in the envelope?”

            “I know what’s in there. It’s a spell for a dimensional gate.” Dominique blinked at his words. “I can see through things with my perception, remember? I don’t know if I can cast it, not being a classical mage yet, but you should be able to. We’ll find out later.”

            “Great.”

            “I just had a thought.” Eve’s eyes narrowed. “Can you see through clothes?”

            “I can. I don’t though. The human body in transparent clothing can look pretty odd and voyeurism never really excited me all that much.”

            Dominique got up and stretched. “I think the most important part of that message was that we now know he evolved pokegirls too. Does that mean he’s a truewizard like you?”

            “No, it doesn’t. That seems to be something entirely separate from any other magical abilities we might have. Apparently as authors we can still rewrite the fabric of the pokegirl universe on the local scale. Together we might be able to pool our powers or something.”

            Vanessa frowned. “Does that make you a threat to the world?”

            “Will you kill me if I say yes?”

            She flushed. “I’m sorry; I didn’t mean it to sound like I was considering you as a target, Iain. I’m not.”

            “Do I behave like a threat to the world?”

            “No, you don’t.”

            “Then I’m not.” He took a gulp from the goblet. “Intent is more important than power.”

            Dominique put a hand on his arm. “What are you going to tell him?”

            “It’s only fair I tell him the truth, Dominique.”

            “Are you going to tell him about Vanessa?”

            Iain hesitated. “I’m not sure yet. I can think of arguments either way, and the truth is that we can’t keep her pregnancy a secret forever. Too many beings on this world have access to some kind of precognition, clairvoyance, spirit guide or the Celestial Awareness. Vanessa, it’s your decision to make as to whether I can tell Micah or not. Then it’ll be my decision as whether or not I want to tell him, but whether I want to or not, you have the final say.”

            She nodded slowly. “You do understand what kind of firestorm this could ignite.”

            “Probably not.” He smiled when she frowned. “We never know what kind of trouble we’re getting into or we probably would get into a lot less trouble. I do know this, we will face it together.”

            Eve looked up from the playback. “We will have to recruit quickly, then.”

            He suddenly looked weary. “I know. We’ll talk about it tomorrow after breakfast. That’ll give you ladies a chance to work on some kind of list. I’ll work on one too.”

            Vanessa looked slowly at each person in turn. “You would all stand with me?” She blinked several times rapidly when they nodded. “I have been alone so long,” she whispered. She wiped the tears from her eyes and nodded firmly. “Tell him. Sexebi said something about secrets that may mean she already knows.”

            “Do we need to kill her?”

            Vanessa’s eyes went wide. “Iain, that’s not funny.”

            “I wasn’t trying to be. If we get close to her and strike without warning, she can be killed. I hope it won’t be necessary, which is why I’m asking you. She’s one of the few legendaries I ever liked.”

            She gave him an odd look. “What about me?”

            “Vanessa, or Evangelion, you are by far my favorite legendary. Smart, tough and honorable is a hard combination to beat. Throw in beautiful and you’re almost irresistible.”

            “Almost?”

            Iain just gave her an amused look. “I am so not going there.”

            “Vanessa,” Eve said quietly, “you did send us on a mission where we already knew the answers you sought. You made it look like you really didn’t want those answers to be true and desperately hoped we’d not find them for you. In lying to yourself, you did put our lives on the line.”

            Vanessa sighed. “And you found it was worse than I thought. They’re expansionist and supremacist to a degree that was shocking and they don’t care at all for what progress any part of the rest of the world has made. If I didn’t know what would happen, I’d already be planning the operation to reduce their numbers to something reasonable.” She touched her stomach gently. “And then there were unforeseen complications.”

            April patted her on the back. “Are there ever foreseen complications?”

            Iain motioned surreptitiously to Eve and she got up. “Ok, ladies, we’ll take it easy for the rest of the day. I’ll take care of dinner while April and Vanessa finish the laundry. Dominique is, as usual, excused to work on doomsday devices. Iain is to work on his magic and help out whoever needs his help the most.”

            Iain held up his hand. “Dominique, stick around for a moment if you would. I’ve got an idea I want to share with you.”

 

***

 

            Eve came into the kitchen and shot a suspicious look towards the cheerfully humming April at the stove. The Duelist smiled at her. “Good morning. Sit down and I’ll bring you some tea and scones.”

            Eve sat next to Iain and leaned over to whisper to him. “Who is that and what did you do with April? Of all the things she is, a morning person is not on the list.”

            He chuckled. “Are you complaining?”

            She closed her mouth as April put a tray on the table. “Here you go, Eve.”

            “Why are you so chipper this morning?”

            “It’s just a nice morning.”

            Eve turned back to Iain. “What changed?”

            “We made a deal. She gets to shave me every morning.”

            “I thought you weren’t excited about her doing that?”

            He shrugged. “I changed my mind and this way you don’t have to remind me to shave.”

            Eve frowned and finally shrugged before reaching for a scone and the butter. “When do you want to talk about the harem?”

            “We’ll do it after breakfast.”

            An hour later Iain took a deep breath and looked down the table. “The first time we have a conference in our new home and half the table is empty of faces that should be here. Their absence hurts, but the journey must go on and we need to fill some of those empty chairs if we’re to have a decent chance to succeed. Eve, please take over.”

            The Megami-sama leaned forward slightly. “We need to clarify what we’re looking for. Iain has already said that we are not going to recruit the same breeds to replace those we’ve lost. He understands it’s an emotional decision, as do we all. However, he’s right. We can’t replace our dead and trying to do so would be a colossal mistake. All of us have special contacts in the world, and I hope we can recruit pokegirls or pokewomen who have experience instead of trying to bring newbies up to speed, but we will train novices if we must and a lack of experience is not going to be a good reason to reject an otherwise suitable recruit.” She flipped open a notebook and uncapped a pen. “Iain, what do you think we should be looking for?”

            “Everyone here, including me,” he smiled slightly, “is magically adept to one degree or another. I think we should stay with that, so pokegirls with magic typing or a graduate of a magical school are pretty much a must have.”

            “Will you consider other types? We do have a lot of magic firepower already.”

            “I’d like everyone or almost everyone capable of teleporting.” He snorted softly. “I’d like to learn to do it myself. Running is always an excellent option.”

            Dominique was working on a large glass of the grape juice they’d picked up on their last trip into town. It had been one of Irena’s favorite drinks and they’d kept it in stock. “What breeds do you not want? I’ve been told you keep claiming to be allergic to cat pokegirls and that you don’t want birds, either.”

            “I am allergic to bird dander. I should be able to stop my allergy someday, but I’m not excited about the idea of cuddling with someone who has flight feathers. I’m not really allergic to cats. I just don’t like the attitude that most cats display. That and when I was writing I got harassed about cat pokegirls and my tendency towards stubbornness made me reluctant to have anything to do with them.”

            April smirked. “You? Stubborn? That’s news to me.” Everyone laughed.

            Dominique wasn’t done and her crimson eyes regarded him skeptically. “What does that mean, Iain?”

            “No bird pokegirls. There are only a couple of bug types that I like and if I have to consider cat pokegirls I will. However, I’ll point out that most magic or psychic cat pokegirls seem to have to play practical jokes, some of which have a tendency to be dangerous. Some newcomer hurts someone with a bucket of half dried paint over a doorway and if she’s lucky, I’ll only sell her that day. Most of the other magic or psychic catgirls, like the Candy Catgirl line, are pathetic combatants or moody or have other psychological issues.”

            April shook her head. “Let’s try something easier. What breeds do you like?”

            “Megami-sama, Duelist, Archmage and Evangelion come to mind,” he said promptly.

            Eve chuckled. “Cute. Iain, unless you want more of those you need to tell us about some other breeds.”

            “Well, in my stories I’ve used and liked Unicorns, Slicers, Vampires, Nogitsune, Dragonqueens, Elfs, Elfqueens, the Wet Elf line, Demon-Goddesses, Neo Iczels, Ladyba, Ladyien, Ponytaur, Rapitaur, Nightmares, Umbrea, Espea, the Youma line, Firemaidens, Dark Ladies, Alaka-Whams, Fallen Angel and some others including Nursejoys. I have used other pokegirls, but these are the ones I really liked. Having said that, these were stories and I don’t want a Dark Lady or a Neo around with their attitudes. I also don’t think mixing infernals with celestials is a good idea. Oh, yeah, and Mini-tops. For some reason I’ve always liked Mini-tops.” He frowned. “I’ve also used a couple of Sphinx, but they come with Sexmet and Bastit and maybe Anubust and I don’t want any more legendaries sniffing around Vanessa than I have to put up with. Then there’s the fact that Sexmet tried to put Macavity on to kill me. According to Magdalene she’d had the information leaked to her by Sanctuary and told Macavity to piss her off, but she still tried to get Macavity to kill me. I don’t think I want to be anywhere near a mentality that thinks the life of someone is a decent price to put Macavity in a bad mood, especially when that someone is me.”

            Eve looked thoughtful. “You’ve got expensive tastes in pokegirls.”

            “It’s worse than that, Eve. I’m also kind of particular. For example, if we found an Alaka-Wham, I’d have to compare her to Whisper or Ming Die and any Elfqueen would be invariably compared to Autumn.”

            Eve blinked. “You know of Autumn?”

            “If you’re talking about the Elfqueen who became a general in Sukebe’s armies right around the end of the war and who did an excellent job, yes. I wrote about her. You’ll probably get to meet her when we go to One.”

            Eve’s mouth dropped. “How?”

            “I’ll probably have to deal with the Kerrik Wolf who is there and Autumn is in his harem. At that point she’d had quintuplets and, depending on how much time has passed, Misery and Whisper may be pregnant. Raven is waiting until Kerrik gets his powers back and can work on fixing some of the problems she’d pass on to parthenogenic kits.”

            Dominique’s eyes went wide. “I remember them. Are you telling me they’re in the same fucking harem? Alive?”

            “It’s an odd mix, but it works. They’ve also got a young Vampire named Morwen in the group, but she’s an odd duck too.”

            “You know them?” Eve was looking curiously at the Archmage.

            Dominique shook her head. “You celestials didn’t deal with the first super predator pokegirls very much, but Raven, Whisper and Misery were some of Sukebe’s specials that were named Death by both sides. They didn’t survive long after the war. A whole bunch of other pokegirls banded together to destroy them after people realized they had longevity and weren’t just going to politely drop dead. The butcher’s bill was incredible and most of the pokegirls who went after them didn’t come back.”

            Eve smiled. “I look forward to meeting them. Iain, the reason I was so curious about Autumn was that I know of an Elfqueen who is supposed to be almost as impressive as she was, and as far as I know she does not have a tamer right now.”

            Iain looked surprised. “Really?”

            “Her name is Ninhursag and she works with the Sisterhood.”

            “She must be pretty impressive to have the name of a Sumerian fertility goddess.”

            “You’ve never heard of her?”

            He frowned. “No, I can’t say I have. Should I have heard of her?”

            “I thought you might since you mentioned that in your stories Autumn had given birth. Ninhursag is one of her daughters.”

            “You’re telling me that there’s a parthenogenic clone of Autumn out there somewhere?”

            “Actually I know of two of them that are still alive, but Ninhursag is the only one that’s currently unattached. The other one is supposed to be working on a farm somewhere in Capital.”

            “Is she a celestial?” This was from April. “I mean, is she blessed?”

            “No, she’s not. We don’t want all of our agents to be blessed and Ninhursag is more of a freelancer than a member of the Sisterhood. That’s why I said she works with us instead of being a full member.” Eve looked at Iain. “Would you like to meet her?”

            “Does anyone have a reason why I shouldn’t? Remember, it can be as illogical as my allergy to cat pokegirls.”

            “I have a question.” Vanessa gave Eve a curious look. “Why has the Sisterhood remained hidden from me and never tried to enlist my aid?”

            “We considered it, but Lucifer is our leader and you’re a legendary. We were unsure if you’d try to take over, depose her and impose your agenda on us. It is very different from ours. It’s the same reason we have remained hidden from Bastit and Whore-oh. Sexmet would definitely try to co-opt us for her wants and would order Bastit to do so, while Whore-oh,” she trailed off and shrugged.

            Vanessa nodded. “Whore-oh is only interested in her own unique goals and would probably only interfere in the work you are trying to accomplish.”

            April cocked her head. “Iain, what’s your opinion of the legendaries?”

            “They’re not worth the ink to print their pokedex entries.” He smiled at Vanessa. “That’s a generalization, of course, and does not apply to present company.”

            “Thank you. I hope Sexebi is on your very short good list.”

            He smiled. “She is.”

            Eve looked around the table. “Anyone want to protest Iain meeting Ninhursag?” She waited for several seconds. “Ok, since nobody is speaking, we’ll adjourn, I’ll find out where she is and we’ll go calling.”

           

***

 

            Eve’s arms tightened around Iain as she banked and turned. We’re getting close. I recognize that mountain as one of the landmarks I was told about, so I’m going to head up to look for the lake. Without waiting for a response, she twisted into a steep climb.

            Dominique matched her easily despite the burden she currently carried. While she could now hover and move about slowly, April was still working to master a flying spell and none of her constructs could match their raw speed so the Archmage carried her.

            Iain reached up to scratch his nose and banged his hand against his goggles. He pulled his hand away, blinked at a tiny sliver of silver at the base of the mountain and pointed. There.

            Eve looked down at him with a puzzled frown. I can barely see that. Have you been improving your vision?

            It was part of the whole package of improvements I gave myself when I became immortal. I also widened my range of hearing slightly and made my taste, touch and olfaction senses more sensitive within human limitations. Anything more would require substantial physical modifications that I’m not comfortable attempting just yet.

            Do I want to know the details? Never mind, I already know the answer to that question and I don’t. She went into a hover for a second. Iain thought it funny that she actually leaned forward to peer more closely at something miles away but knew better than to remark on it. It looks like you’re right and this is the lake. Ninhursag’s house should be on the western tip, so keep looking on that side for it. Then she accelerated hard for the lake.

            April’s thought drifted through his mind as Dominique fell in behind and above Eve. How is it that such a powerful Elfqueen doesn’t have a queendom?

            Eve’s response was overlaid with emotions suggesting she’d wondered that herself. Nobody knows. She just hasn’t ever established one.

            As they approached, Iain finally spotted what looked like a cottage on the northwestern side of the lake. He looked closer as the crossed the edge of the lake. Stop. There was a prone figure in front of the cottage. It was surrounded by small things he couldn’t identify from here that glittered irregularly in the sunlight. Eve, it looks like someone was attacked.

            April created her Black Skull Dragon underneath her and Dominique darted down to deposit the Duelist on the flying dragon’s back. Another flash and the Dark Magician Girl appeared. I’ll keep overhead watch while you three investigate. The Dark Magician Girl flew off in a widening circle while April and the Black Skull Dragon began climbing for altitude.

            Eve pulsed a feeling of approval and dove. Dominique began to drift away from her as they dropped, widening the distance and lowering the chances of a wide area attack of some kind catching all three of them. Then her gold armor encased her and she darted ahead to land a short distance from the body.

            The body was female and a short spray of reddish yellow hair spread out from the top of her head. She was stretched out and, from where he was, Iain couldn’t see any obvious signs of injury. He watched as Dominique quickly checked the body over before examining one of the dark, shiny objects. She shook her head and stood, waving at Eve. You can land now. She’s an Elfqueen, although a lot bigger than any I’ve ever seen before. She’s unconscious and from all of the broken bottles around her and the way she smells, I’d say she’s sleeping off one hell of a drunk. I’ll go ahead and clear the house. She summoned her staff and headed into the cottage as Eve spiraled down to land and let Iain go.

            The Elfqueen was wearing some sleeveless laminar armor made of overlapping leather plates over a cotton tunic. The armor reminded Iain of a variant on the lorica segmentata worn by the Roman legionnaires. The armor hung down to her thighs and underneath them she wore heavy woolen pants and knee length boots. The crotch of her pants was soaked and she reeked of sour urine and excrement.

            Dominique appeared in the doorway. “It looks like she trashed the interior before coming out here. Just about everything that can be broken was. Eve, you really picked a winner this time.”

            Eve gave her an angry glare. “She wasn’t like this before. Iain, should we go home?”

            He regarded the Elfqueen solemnly. “No. You recommended her and we’ll talk to her before returning home. Besides, if we leave she might be killed by a passing feral. Let her be to sleep it off and we’ll set up over by the lake. I think some underwater training is in order for everyone.”

            “You’re kidding, right?” Dominique shook her head. “She’s a wreck.”

            Iain shrugged. “I have a hunch, Dominique.”

            She sighed. “Fuck. I’ll get the tent set up.”

            Eve chuckled.  “You just want to see us in soaked clothing.”

            He winked. “No, I want to see you removing soaked clothing.”

            An hour later Iain was drying out on a rock when he heard a groan and some coughing. He sat up just in time to see the Elfqueen roll onto her side and throw up noisily for a while, eventually being reduced to the dry heaves. He headed for the decanter in Dominique’s pack and filled up a cup with water. He stopped a few meters from her as she wiped her mouth and sat up. “Want some water?”

            Her head snapped around and bloodshot brown eyes glared at him as a silver colored energy blade sprouted from her right hand. “Who the fuck are you?”

            “Iain Grey. Eve, whom you may know as Danielle the Megami or Megami-sama, brought me here.”

            “She left you here?”

            “No, she and the rest of my harem are training in the lake.”

            “I don’t believe you. You’re here to catch and tame me.”

            “You shit yourself last night and you are soaked with stale booze. I don’t want anything to do with any part of your anatomy until you’ve bathed.”

            The Elfqueen blinked and looked down at herself. Suddenly she turned green and rolled sideways to retch again.

            The whole time she kept the energy blade pointed at him.

            When she finally sat up, he gestured with the cup. “Some water will either settle your stomach or give you something to throw up.”

            “I don’t trust you.” The energy blade vanished as she dispelled it.

            He shrugged and drank, draining the cup in one go. “Fine. Fuck you too.” He waved at the shoreline behind him. “You lucked out and there’s a whole fucking lake right over there. There’s no way I could have poisoned it.”

            “You’re a mouthy prick.”

            He headed back to the campfire. “If all I wanted to do was catch your ass, you’d already be pokeballed, cleaned, conditioned and completely fucked. I’ve been here for a while and you’ve been dead to the world the whole time.” He glanced at her to catch her pushing herself to her feet. “It would have been simple to finish you off.”

            She wobbled for a second and then dropped to her knees. “I can’t fucking walk.” She glanced at him only to see him watching her expressionlessly. Her face set and she began crawling towards the lake.

            Iain pulled the skillet out of the pack. It was one of the first things Dominique had finished for the new place, only the tea kettle being completed first, and, like the kettle, was enchanted to heat on its own when the operator thought of a temperature. He released a bag of bread and a small bowl of butter. “There’ll be toast ready for you when you’re done cleaning up. You should be hungry by then.”

            She grunted loudly as she crawled by him. “What do you care?”

            “I don’t, but you don’t have any food in your house and we do. Eve would want me to be hospitable to you, so I am.”

            She stopped in mid crawl and glared at him. “You always do what your women want?”

            “Usually. Why, you want something?”

            “I’m not one of your fucking women.” She blinked and choked a laugh. “Bad pun.”

            “Eve brought me here because she thought you might be good enough to join my harem.”

            “Me? Good enough to join you? Well isn’t that special.” She went back to crawling, finally sliding into the water.

             A few minutes later he could hear Eve whispering, followed by the Elfqueen’s voice at a normal level. “I am not going to wear one of your dresses and my clothes need to dry. What’s wrong with being nude, woman?” More whispering. “If he stares, I’ll poke his damned eyes out.” She waded out of the water and laid her clothes on some bushes before coming over and sitting down crosslegged across from him. “You got something to say?”

            Iain met her gaze, deliberately ignoring her nudity. “You want water, tea or milk with your toast?”

            A tiny frown crossed her face. “Is that Milktit milk?”

            “Yes, but it’s been treated so it won’t cause lactation.”

            “I’ll take the milk then.” She ate while he worked on toasting more bread. “I’m impressed. You haven’t looked at me once.”

            “I’m not ready to have to grow my eyes back again.”

            She snickered. “Frightened you, did I?”

            “It’s not that. The last time it took a couple of days before my eyes finished adjusting. I had headaches pretty much the whole time.”

            “You really had to grow your eyes back.”

            He glanced up at her. “I don’t have any reason to lie to you right now.”

            She went back to eating for a few minutes. “Why did Eve think of me for your harem? I have never been in one.”

            “We lost four of our harem and she says we need to recruit some new members,” he began.

            She cut him off with a sneer. “Wanted to replace your losses, did you?”

            He flared instantly. “You’re not a pimple on Scheherazade’s ass, bitch, much less anyone else’s. I can never replace them. Eve just thought that considering your lineage you might be something special in your own fucking right.”

            “What do you know about me?”

            “Not a fucking thing other than what I’ve seen today. I just know Autumn was one of the most powerful Elfqueens I’ve ever heard of and I hoped you’d be that way too.”

            She snorted. “What do you know about Autumn?”

            “Eve says she’s your mother. From what I know, she was one of Sukebe’s best generals. She just came along too late to win the fucking war for him. Then she ended up in Indigo with an asshole that treated her like shit when she underwent parthenogenesis and got pregnant with quintuplets.”

            The Elfqueen blinked. “I’d forgotten about us being quints. One died at birth and I don’t remember her.”

            “So you are Ninhursag.”

            “Who else would I be?”

            “A midget Giantess, perhaps.”

            She fought not to smile. “You really do what your women want?”

            “I try to, but I’m not their slave. Why, you have something you need done?”

            She was silent for a while. “I want a man dead. I want to see him die and I really want to kill him myself. What do you think about that?”

            “Is it me?”

            “Of course not, we just met.”

            “Sometimes I rub people the wrong way pretty quickly, so I was just making sure. Does he deserve to die?”

            Her eyes narrowed. “Several times over.”

            “Why haven’t you killed him yet?”

            “I can’t. I’ve tried every year for two hundred years.”

            Iain looked up again in surprise. “Well, I’ll grant that you’re determined. Would you like us to take a look at the situation?”

            “Don’t you want to know what he did?”

            “Eve respects you and you say he needs to die and it’s not me. That’s good enough. If you’d like, we’ll eat after training is over and then go.” He tossed her a P-med dispenser. “Oh, this is for you. It’s full of antidotes.”

            She stared at it. “What is this for?”

            “It’s called alcohol poisoning for a reason, Ninhursag.”

            She blinked at him, then pressed the dispenser against her neck and hit the trigger. It hissed and she shuddered. “Oh, that feels so good.” She put the dispenser down. “You ever hurt so much that you don’t realize just how bad it is until the pain stops?”

            “I can understand how it might feel.”

            She snorted. “I doubt that. I wish I’d known about this cure for hangover a century ago.”

            He looked up once more. “Why were you drinking?”

            She looked thoughtful for a while before speaking again. They could hear Eve and the others heading out of the water a dozen or so meters away when she spoke. “I realized that I could only give so much time to trying to kill him or I’d go crazy. So I only go to kill him one week out of every year. I get drunk when I’m done because it makes the hurt of failing go away for a little while. Then I sober up and go back to working and trying to figure out what I did wrong for the rest of the year.”

            “That’s been your whole life for two hundred years?”

            “Two hundred and twelve years, to be exact.”

            “That’s not much of a life, but I’m sure you have your reasons.”

            “Iain, isn’t it?” When he nodded, she continued. “What makes you think you can do what I couldn’t?”

            “I said we’d take a look at the situation. That’s a lot different from me guaranteeing he’s a dead man. However, Eve and Dominique are talented mages and I seem to have a proclivity for making people dead.” He scratched at Beryl’s tattoo. She and Skye were his guardians at present. “I’ve been told I have an affinity for the dead. Maybe that extends to making more of them.”

            Eve and the others joined them at the camp. “Eve, I believe you know Ninhursag.”

            Eve looked at the Elfqueen. “Are you doing all right?”

            Ninhursag started to speak when Iain interrupted her. “She’s had a bad week, Eve, and we caught her at the worst possible moment. She’s fine.”

            The Elfqueen’s eyes narrowed. “You don’t make excuses for me.”

            “Fine. I guess we’ve come full circle and have now returned to fuck you then.” He went back to making toast.

            “Iain!”

            He looked up. “I think we’ve already had the talk where you discover that you don’t use that tone with me unless you’d like to have a fight. It’s not a good time. We’ve got other things to do after we eat.”

            Eve sighed. “Like what?”

            “Murder.”

            “What!”

            Ninhursag scowled. “It’s justice.”

            “To you it may be and you may be entirely correct. I just agreed to kill someone I know nothing about. That’s murder. It’s ok; it turns out that murder is a perfectly acceptable form of expression, as long as it’s justified. It won’t even be my first time.”

            April stared at him. “Who did you murder?”

            “I remember shooting a little girl in the back of the head in Wellham.”

            Ninhursag dropped her toast in shock as April glared at him. “She was a Zombabe, Iain. You had to do it before she finished turning and attacked us or her mother.”

            He shrugged. “Potaytoe, potahtoe. Anyway, Ninhursag wants us to see if we can help set things up so she can kill someone.”

            Dominique looked curious. “Who?”

            “I haven’t the foggiest. That’s what makes it murder.” Iain turned off the pan and began putting everything away. “Now, Dominique, cycle everybody through healing and let’s go see what we shall see.”

            After being healed, Eve sat down next to Ninhursag while April and Dominique took turns being run through the PPHU. “Where are we going?”

            “He’s in the Amethyst League.”

            “Who is he and what did he do?”

            “My opinion was good enough for your,” she paused, “did you really marry him?”

            “Yes, I did. Now answer the question.”

            The Elfqueen smiled slightly. “You used to be easier to distract.”

            “The fact that I’m not is probably Iain’s fault. He can be as single-minded as they come. You’re still not answering the question.”

            “His name is Giuseppe Spadolini.” Ninhursag got up and retrieved her clothes from the bush. She turned back to Eve and began getting dressed. “I had three sisters once. He captured and killed two of them two centuries ago. I’ve been trying to kill him ever since.”

            “He has longevity?”

            “No, he’s a graduate of Vale and just as soon as he realized he couldn’t kill me too and that I was going to exact justice for the murders of my sisters, he took refuge in a spell so I can’t get to him.”

            “What does it do?”

            “It put him into some kind of suspended animation.”

            Eve frowned. “It could be permanent. That would make him as good as dead.”

            “No, it’s not. He left me a letter to taunt me and in it he let me know that the spell would end after I’d died of old age.”

            Iain waved from where he stood with Dominique. “Ladies, we’re waiting on you two.” He rubbed his chin. “Ok, how do we get to this individual?”

            “I can teleport and I’ll take you there. Your harem can follow behind.”

            She reached for Iain only to be blocked by April. “I think you’ll take me and I’ll be the anchor point for the others, missy.”

            “You don’t trust me?”

            “I don’t trust anyone outside the harem when Iain’s at risk. So he doesn’t go first, I do. You have a problem with that, go kill your human by yourself.”

            Ninhursag turned to Iain. “So you’re a coward?”

            Dominique summoned her staff. “I am getting really tired of your attitude. Either you remember that we don’t obey you and tone it down a bit or we’re going home and you can go back to puking for fun.”

            The Elfqueen glared at them all before taking a deep breath. “When you can’t help me, I don’t want to see any of you again.”

            “And if we can, what do we get?” Dominique tapped the butt of her staff on the ground impatiently. “Or is this just a freebee?”

            “Dominique?” When she looked at Iain, he shook his head. “I didn’t put any conditions on examining the situation, so we’re not obligating her for anything.”

            “It was easier when you were angry all the time. Then you’d have let me smack her around.”

            He chuckled. “You’re probably right, but the price was too steep. Ninhursag, April is right. You can take one of them and they’ll lead the rest of us to you, or you can forget the whole idea. I’m not playing boy hostage again if I can avoid it.”

            “Then follow if you dare.” The Elfqueen grabbed April’s hand and they vanished.

            “Do you really want that attitude living with us?” Dominique wrapped her fingers around his arm and the landscape changed around them.

            He grinned and tugged his arm free as he looked around. “Oh, I don’t know, you and I didn’t get along all that well in the beginning. Maybe I need to grow on her like I did on you.” His grin widened when she laughed and smacked him on the shoulder.

            They were standing on a hillside, not too far from April and Ninhursag. Around them were more hills while off to the east he could see the blue ribbon of a river twisting from north to south. “Where are we?”

            Ninhursag pointed at the river. “That’s the Tiber. We’re twenty kilometers north of Ream in the Tiber Valley. Spadolini was a pureblood who had a villa right over there.” She turned and pointed at a pile of vine covered ruins. They showed evidence of charring and only remotely looked like a dwelling. “He was there when I went after him and he’s still there.”

            “How do we get inside?”

            “I get into his lab, which is located in the basement, by teleporting. I didn’t want to leave a way for the locals to find Spadolini and figure out some way to rescue him or move him where I couldn’t find him, so I pulled the ruins down over the entrance to the basement to keep them and feral pokegirls out.”

            Eve was looking at the ruins. We might want to consider looking for a pokegirl who can phase. Scheherazade’s ability to do that proved very useful on several occasions.

            Iain nodded somberly. “April, please go inside with Ninhursag and see what this place looks like. If there’s room, we’ll all join you.” He glanced at Eve. You’re right. Add phase to our list of desirable abilities. Also, having a place without an entrance could prove useful for us.

            Ninhursag took April’s hand again. “We’ll be right back.” They vanished, only to return a minute later.

            “Well, April?”

            “It is a lab similar to the first one Dominique had, but it’s bigger and it’s dusty and dark. There’s plenty of room for everyone. Except for one chair, all of the furniture has been turned into pieces small enough for kindling. All of the glassware and other stuff has been shoved against one wall. In the western corner is a large chunk of what looks like amber, although it glows slightly in the darkness. Inside it is a man with torn clothes and some cuts on his face. He’s grinning and has his left hand raised with the middle finger pointed up in a definite ‘fuck you’.”

            Ninhursag nodded. “That’s Spadolini. I thought I had him cornered and he got that spell up just before I could finish him off.”

            Iain frowned slightly. “Was he like that when the spell finished?”

            “No, that happened about ten years later. I came back and he was like that.”

            Dominique looked intrigued. “Then time may be passing for him, just very slowly. It’s an interesting idea.” She suddenly got a thoughtful expression. “Hmm.”

            Eve tapped her on the forehead. “Focus, Dominique.”

            “Sorry. I was considering the magic involved. Iain, it’s likely that he was trying for full stasis and didn’t get what he wanted. Get the time distortion off just a little bit and he’d starve to death while waiting for the spell to expire. Of course, he might be able to dismiss the spell at will, but since he knows he has to wait several hundred years before he could be sure that Ninhursag was dead, he would not want to take the chance of coming out early only to find her waiting for him.”

            “What would keep him from achieving full stasis?”

            The Archmage shrugged. “I think he was probably too rushed to finish the spell properly. Ninhursag may have been closer to a win than she thought.”

            The Elfqueen scowled. “While it’s nice to hear I almost got him, I still want to finish the job.”

            Iain looked around. “April, please take Dominique inside and then you’ve got perimeter security. At the first sign of trouble, yell for help. Dominique, Eve and I will take a look at Spadolini.”

            “Iain, I’m not comfortable leaving someone out here alone. I’d like to stay out here to help April. If you and Dominique need my help, call me.”

            April smiled. “I’d like the company, Iain. I’ve never been to Amethyst before and it’s making me nervous. I’d rather not be alone.”

            He nodded. “If April wants your help, then by all means give it to her, Eve. April can take me and Dominique and then come back out here. Please be careful ladies and remember my request for you to inform us if anything even looks out of place.”

            Ninhursag gave him a defiant look. “What about me?”

            “I won’t give you orders. I figured you’d join us in the laboratory, but if you leave and we get Giuseppe out and you’re not here, if he tries anything he’ll be dead before you return.”

            Her eyes narrowed. “I’m not going anywhere. I’ll be there.”

            A few minutes later Iain stood in the basement lab of Giuseppe Spadolini and looked around as Dominique filled the room with enough light globes to simulate full daylight. It was pretty much as April had described, although the glassware was cracked and discolored by the dried remains of ancient chemicals and other things. The room was humid and mildew covered much of the fragments of furniture. The single chair was made of plastic and didn’t match anything else in the room.

            The western corner was filled from floor to ceiling and from wall to wall by a block of what looked like amber. When they first arrived it was glowing softly from some internal light, highlighting the man inside. Giuseppe was about 1.7 meters tall and had a receding hairline. His florid face was going to fat and a fresh jagged line ran from the side of his right eye down to his neck. He was wearing brown coveralls that were stained and torn and one boot.

            Like April had described, he was grinning manically and his right hand was held at shoulder height with his middle finger extended towards the sky. But Iain could see fear in the mage’s frozen eyes and he knew it had been a very close call indeed.

            Iain frowned. “Why is he only wearing one boot?”

            Ninhursag chuckled. “We were fighting outside and I grabbed him around the foot with a vine. He got loose by kicking off that boot. I thought I’d missed which is why I didn’t send the vine up his leg.”

            Dominique gave her an oblique look. “How’d you miss that?”

            “It was two in the morning and was supposed to be kind of dark. I figured ambushing a human at night would give me an edge. It did, but not as much of one as I’d thought. The asshole had spells pre-positioned that lit up the area around his home if he was attacked. He activated them and I was still recovering from the sudden increase in light when I nabbed him with the vine. He wriggled free before I realized I’d actually connected.”

            Iain picked up a piece of wood and tossed it at the amber. It hit and bounced off. Ninhursag smirked. “You can touch it, too, and it seems to be completely inert. It feels solid and warmer than body temperature, but not much. It has no scent that I can discern, makes no noise and has no flavor when you lick it.” She shrugged when Iain’s eyebrows went up. “I spent most of the first year trying to get at him before going to one week a year, but even with that, I’ve been working on this for over four years in total. I’ve tried everything I can think of.” She folded her arms and dropped into the chair. “I attended classes at Vale, I did short stints as an apprentice for various mages until they tried to force me into their beds and I did lots of research at any library I could get access to. I know more magic than any Elfqueen I’ve ever ran across.” She sighed. “It’s made me unwelcome at every Queendom that knows I’m alive. They all know I could take over if I wanted to, so they don’t want me anywhere near their precious skin. They don’t understand it would take away too much time from my primary goals.”

            Dominique finished casting some research spells and began taking readings. She worked for about twenty minutes before stepping away from the block of amber. “First of all, this thing is pure energy. From what I can tell, it works to refract time the same way a prism warps light. He has slowed down the passage of time through the field so he’s in almost complete stasis.” She ran her fingers through her hair. “He had to have put some kind of expiration on it because he can’t see outside the field and because the differential is inexact, trying to hit a certain time from the inside could put the exit point off by centuries. I can detect the energy of the spell slowly running down, but since I have no idea at what energy level the spell will collapse, I can’t estimate when it will end.” Her teeth flashed whitely. “But I do think we can bring it down.”

            Ninhursag’s eyes went wide. “How,” she breathed.

            “Iain’s the only one who has a chance.” She smirked when he looked surprised. “You can use your absorbing trick to drain the field and collapse the spell.”

            The Elfqueen instantly disagreed. “I tried to do that several years ago. It didn’t work.”

            Dominique grinned. “You couldn’t do it, perhaps, but when Iain sucks, he really sucks.”

            “You were waiting to find a way to say that, weren’t you?” Iain shook his head when she winked. “Bloody hell.”

            “It’s only true,” she replied smugly. “Now get to sucking.”

            “You’re an evil, evil woman and I’ll get you for this somehow.” She laughed as he stepped forward and pressed his palms against the amber wall, imagining that the sphere increased its absorption a hundredfold. He could feel the wall waver slightly beneath his fingers and then solidify again as it compensated for the drain. “I don’t know if this will work, but step over there in case something odd happens.”

            Dominique pulled Ninhursag into the far corner of the room. “We’re out of the way, Iain.”

            Iain flexed his fingers against the wall and imagined the torrential drain he’d used on Mhodvitnar. Ninhursag choked off a gasp as a golden sphere slowly spread outward from Iain until it extended a meter in all directions. It touched one of the light globes as it expanded and the light vanished instantly. He could feel the spell around the mage weaken slightly and then begin to recharge from the ambient magic that surrounded them, so he imagined his field growing to encompass the entire spell area, but not moving in the direction of Dominique and Ninhursag. The sphere went from gold to sapphire and distorted as it bulged and flowed over the amber, covering it completely and extending into the rock behind the basement walls. Cut off from its recharge source, the time distortion field around Spadolini began to quickly weaken, and Iain analyzed it as the power drained away and time inside the field began to speed up and merge with the time stream he lived in.

            As time sped up inside the amber, Spadolini’s eyes began to slowly widen and he reached down to pull a wickedly curved knife from his belt. He moved forward as the amber pulsed and vanished, driving the knife at Iain’s stomach as the sapphire sphere dissipated.

            Beryl erupted from his arm and drove her fist into the mage’s face, knocking him away from her master before the knife could connect. She hissed but remained still as Giuseppe cracked his skull against the wall of the basement and slid slowly to the ground. “You wish this one alive?”

            Ninhursag gaped at the tableau as Iain nodded. “I do. I also don’t want him to flee. Break his arm.”

            Beryl darted forward and took Spadolini’s right forearm in both of hers. She twisted her hands like she was breaking a stick and Spadolini came up with a scream as the radius and ulna shattered. The Dragoness released him and stepped away. “Master.”

            “Thank you, Beryl.” The Dragoness flowed back into his arm as Iain turned around. “Dominique, I think Ninhursag wants some special time with this gentleman.” He flashed a smile as the Elfqueen’s eyes lit up. “I happen to be a history nut with a focus on the Roman Republic and Empire and I’ve never been to Italy before. I doubt we can really go sightseeing, but I think I’d like to bathe in the Tiber before we return home.” He cocked his head. “Ninhursag, I wonder if you would like us to remain nearby while you discuss your sisters with Giuseppe.”

            “I would. After I’m done, I’d like to talk to all of you.”

            He slipped his arm through Dominique’s. “We’ll be nearby.”

            An hour later Iain was sunning on a flat rock and reading when Ninhursag appeared. She ignored him and squelched past his rock to wade out into the Tiber until her nose was just above the surface. Red streamed away from her in a cloud as the current washed her clean. She stood there for several minutes before ducking her head underwater and surfacing to shake her short length hair violently. Then she went back to standing in the deep current.

            Eve sat down next to him. “Dominique and April are on patrol right now. I’ve got a question. What do you think happened,” she asked quietly. When he gave her a questioning look she shrugged. “You’re the closest thing to an expert I’ve got on anger right now.”

            “I think she vented two centuries of rage and she’s feeling completely drained. I recommend leaving her alone right now.”

            “Did I make a mistake in suggesting her to you?”

            He shrugged. “I think we were able to help someone. Maybe that’s why she came to your mind. In any case, I got to swim in the Tiber River and get Roman minnows in my underwear.”

            She gave a quiet laugh. “What happens now?”

            “Eve, I suspect that at this moment nobody knows what’s next. Ninhursag just achieved what has been her life’s goal. She’s pursued it for longer than I’ve been alive. She’s not thinking about what happens. She’s probably not thinking at all.”

            “I’m thinking the two of you should shut up.” Ninhursag turned and waded out of the water, undoing the laces on her armor as she did so. “I’m also thinking,” she said as she stripped and hung her clothes up, “that I’m spending more time undressed around you than dressed and you haven’t yet really looked at me.”

            He refused to take the bait and look in her direction. “You mentioned poking out my eyes, remember?”

            “That thing on your arm makes me think you could prevent that from happening. What is that, anyway, some new Tats spell tattoo?”

            “No, it’s not.”

            “What is it?”

            Eve started to answer when Iain raised a hand. “It’s none of your business.”

            “And if I want to make it my business? I don’t like magic I don’t understand.”

            He rolled over and looked into her eyes. “Tough. You can’t make my business yours.”

            “I thought you wanted me to join your harem.”

            “Eve wanted to introduce us, remember. I didn’t express an opinion. Besides, some secrets don’t get explained until after you’ve signed the contract.”

            “Contract?”

            Eve chuckled. “He means until and if you join our little family.”

            Ninhursag turned to Eve. “Is he like this all the time?”

            “More often than not, yes, he is. He’s protective and secretive, especially when it involves outsiders.”

            “Why would you think that he would be good for me?”

            Eve shrugged. “I didn’t consider his suitability for you, just your potential suitability for us.”

            Ninhursag blinked. “I thought a Megami would explode before she thought of just herself. Are you on some super suicidal mission?”

            “We are, but only out of necessity.”

            The Elfqueen shook her head. “Who is it?”

            “Sanctuary.”

            “Those idiots?”

            Eve cocked her head. “Why do you call them that?”

            “They’ve got enough power to take any single league that’s near them and they’re still busy stabbing each other in the back.”

            “How do you know about them?”

            “I studied anywhere I could, remember? I learned some magic in Sanctuary. I wasn’t impressed with the leadership, considering the fact that they wanted to fuck me over as much as the humans do. They even ambushed me when I was leaving, claiming that I knew too much about their secrets and that my power was too impressive to let the humans get.” She shrugged. “I hadn’t given them all of my secrets and got away. What did you do to them to piss them off?”

            “They think I and some others have the ability to change the fabric of reality and kidnapped us to remake the world into a Sanctuary Goth paradise. It turned out that their bidding was all stick and no carrot, so I escaped. Since they’re not about to give up, I have to decapitate their leadership before we flee to another world.”

            Ninhursag frowned. “If they’re mad at you, you’re right about them not giving up. They chased me for fifty years before I faked my death. So, can you remake the fabric of reality?”

            Iain shrugged. “There have been some recent signs that their theory might have not been entirely baseless. However, if I could do what they think, they’d already be just a bad memory.”

            “Why me?”

            “I already answered that. Autumn is the strongest Elfqueen I know of and you should have her power level.”

            Ninhursag snorted. “My mother died when she was fifty. I am nearly three hundred and I am more powerful than she ever was.”

            “I guess that means you’re not interested.”

            She sat down in front of him. “Did Sanctuary kill your other harem members, Iain?”

            “No. They were killed by a powerful mage.”

            “What happened to her?”

            “It was a he and I killed him.”

            “I hate restraints.”

            He shrugged. “So do I. So I won’t put you in them and you won’t put me in them.”

            The Elfqueen laughed. “I don’t know. I’ve never been in a harem or been bound to anyone.”

            “Why don’t you stay with us for a few days?” Iain rubbed his eyes hard with the palms of his hands. “We’ve got room and your place was trashed. You can see what life with us is like and learn some of our secrets. Even if you don’t decide to stick around, it’ll mean you don’t have to clean your house for a few days.” He put his hands on his knees. “Right now you accomplished the goal that’s carried you through the last two centuries. You’re going to need a bit of decompression and I won’t force you to commit to anything you don’t want to. Eve wouldn’t hear of me conking you on the head and having my wicked way with you. You can’t beat the morals of a Megami and the food is pretty good.”

            “You’ll keep your hands to yourself?”

            He nodded. “I promise.”

            “Then I’d be honored to be your guest.”

 

***

 

            “Iain, here’s the box.” April put a large wooden crate down on the floor next to his desk. “Sorry it took so long, but there was a question that needed to be answered about sizing. I didn’t have any information, so I guessed.”

            “Sizing?”

            She opened the crate and pulled out a fifty centimeter tall plush doll and handed it to him. “As you know, Seamstresses are sticklers for detail.”

            Iain held up the doll and examined it. It was a plush reproduction of Micah Hakbui, and was almost perfect. His horns, tail and wings were shaped felt that had been stuffed to give them some stiffness without making them hard. Only his clothes were different and had been replaced with a comfortable hooded robe with slits for his wings and tail. His boots had been replaced with soft sandals on his feet.

            April grinned. “She made it anatomically correct.”

            “Really? Iain peeked under the robe. “You’re not kidding.”

            “That was the problem. She wanted to know if the size should be small, average, large or fantasy.”

            “What did you tell her?” Iain peeked again and chuckled.

            “Large usually plays to a man’s ego and it’ll amuse everyone else if it’s wrong.” She folded her arms. “I ordered eighteen of them. That should sufficient for his harem and Sexebi along with a few extra. Think this is sufficient payback for that shirt?”

            “I also hope he’ll think its funny, April.”

            “We do. Vanessa thinks they’re great while Ninhursag laughed herself silly when she saw it and asked where the Iain dolls are.”

            He blinked. “What did you tell her?”

            April gave him a smug smile. “They’ll be here in a week, but I don’t think she’ll get one unless she joins the harem.”

            “Tell me you’re kidding.”

            “Ok, but it’ll be a lie.”

            “Shit.” Iain sighed and settled back in his chair with the player. “You want to stay while I compose a message to Micah?”

            “I think everyone wants to be here. Even Ninhursag should see this.” The Duelist smiled slightly. “It’ll give her a good briefing on things she needs to know if she’s going to stay.”

            “Is she thinking about it?”

            “She’s been here a week, Iain. Trust me; she’s almost decided to stay.”

            “Fine, go get everyone, por favor. I’ll wait.”

            April kissed him on the cheek and took the doll from him. “Or did you want one for yourself?” She laughed when he glowered at her and took the box away.

            A few minutes later everyone was in his office. Vanessa and Ninhursag were sitting on the couch while April and Eve were in chairs and Dominique was leaning against the wall near the door. Eve had brought him a large goblet of wine for this. “Ok, ladies, I’m going to record my latest message to Micah. I’d like all of you to be quiet while I’m doing it. Ninhursag, you’re here because you’re trying to fit in and because this’ll give you some information that you don’t have yet.”

            She nodded. “Thanks.”

            Iain turned on the recorder and leaned back in his chair. He smiled broadly. “Felicitations, Micah. I was pleased to hear from you and pleased for the gifts. I’m sending something back to you and I hope your harem finds it entertaining.” His smile faded. “Unfortunately I have to open this with bad news. Since the last time we spoke, I and my ladies were attacked. Scheherazade, Irena, Montsho and Hathor were all killed in that attack. It wasn’t anything we could have anticipated and we killed the attacker, but still, I failed them. I am sorry to have to tell you this.”

            He sighed. “I was really looking forward to Ludmilla meeting Scheherazade and learning about the Dread Wolf evolution, too.” He nodded to an unseen audience. “That’s right; she became an evolution that never existed outside my notes, just like some of your pokegirls did. I’ll append all the information on the evolution in case Ludmilla is interested in looking it over. I have also evolved Dominique from Dark Elf to Archmage, completely skipping the Enchantress step in the process and I evolved Eve to Megami-sama. While evolving them, we also ended up delta bonded.”

            He sipped at the wine. “In addition, I consciously evolved April from Ingenue to Duelist. So not only is what you did not unique to you, there may be a bit more that you can do with it. Can you use it to bless pokegirls to Sanctuary Goth? I don’t know. I used an ebony stone with Irena.” He took a gulp of wine. “It’s some heavy stuff and once you pick your jaw up, I’m not yet done.”

            His eyes met Vanessa’s questioningly and she nodded. “Then there’s the presence of Evangelion or, as we call her, Vanessa, in our home.” Ninhursag’s eyes bugged and she twisted to stare at her couch-mate. “Vanessa was accidentally involved in the episode where Scheherazade, Dominique and Eve all evolved. We later found out that the incident had resulted in her becoming pregnant. She thinks it’s a parthenogenic pregnancy, but we’re not sure yet.”

            “I do have access to the Dark Continent, or Africa, and I also have a pass that should get me into the High Council building itself. I have the same idea you did; that is decapitating the command elements of Sanctuary and then fleeing. I think we’re close to a breakthrough on how to do that, but only time will tell for certain.”

            “I’m pleased that you’re interested in emigrating to Pokegirl One. I have arranged transport with Magdalene, one of Kerrik’s wives, and since she owes me a favor, she’ll take you there too. I am grateful for the dimensional portal spell, though, and I think it’ll come in useful in the future.”

            He spun the goblet between his fingers, watching the wine inside it spin. “Thanks for explaining what you are doing with making more Sanctuary Goths and I can attest from personal experience that the ones who aren’t inculcated into the Sanctuary belief system are normal people instead of world domineering sociopaths. I’m not sure your idea will work, but then we’re authors and if you believe it will enough, maybe it will.” His smile turned wry. “At least we can hope so. A cure for the feral state would make a lot of things better for everyone here. And if you’ve got one, it’ll really help on Pokegirl One. It may be that we can adapt it to our pokegirls, so that neither they nor their children will go feral.”

            He drained the goblet and chuckled as he looked at it. “You probably think I’m becoming a lush, but the truth is that one of the changes I made internally won’t let me get drunk. I don’t even get a buzz anymore. I never drank to get drunk though, so I won’t miss it. Besides, I’m a mean drunk and once was more than enough to show me that I never want to lose control like that again, especially not now.” He chuckled. “Oh, and no, Devon isn’t an asshole anymore. He’s actually grown into a decent person. But we can’t trust him any more than we can trust anyone else on this world. So don’t.”

            He put the goblet down and faced the camera squarely. “I want to wish you the best and if, when we get through this we’ll move to One and start a new life, hopefully one where the most trouble we’ll have is with ferals getting in the trash. I wish you well, Micah, and someday we’ll actually meet. Be well, my friend.” He clicked off the recorder.

 

***

 

Iain Grey - Tradesman

Eve - Megami-sama (maharani)

Dominique - Blessed Archmage

April - Duelist

 

Dragonesses

Eirian - Silver

Skye - Blue

Emerald - Green

Aurum - Gold

Beryl - Red