Into the Fire
Two
“Fuck.” Kerrik muttered as he slapped at his neck. The bug that had been tormenting him with bites whined away before he could hit it. Around his head circled the rest of the insect’s family, waiting their turn to dine.
I have enhanced senses and I can hear you when you talk. We are here because there are ferals to catch and other pokegirls may be closer than I am and may be able to hear you as well. Please be quiet.
He glared at the forest around him. It was early morning and the leaves dripped with moisture around him. The sound of the drops hitting the undergrowth made a rustling in the leaves just like something was walking. He had to make a conscious effort to remain still and not jerk around to look at every new noise. Pokegirls in general, and the more primitive ferals especially, were sensitive to motion. Humans were motion hunters and pokegirls, being mostly human, were the same way.
He focused his mind like Scheherazade had suggested. If I’m that much trouble do you think I should climb a tree? He waited for a moment and then sighed softly. Fuck, I can’t even do this mental projection stuff right. Nothing. Either he really wasn’t doing it right or she was ignoring him. He wasn’t sure which he’d prefer at this point. For ten credits, he’d pack in the whole idea and return to Dundalk.
He hadn’t camped in years, and he’d never had to stay in a bloody cave. He’d been proud that he’d managed to start a fire and get it burning well. Then the smoke had driven both of them out of it. He’d had to dunk his shirt in seawater and wrap it over his face before he could go in and kick the fire apart.
That reminded him and his skin under the shirt went back to itching from the salt. He’d have to bathe and wash his clothes when they got done with this joyous adventure.
He slowly rotated his head and froze when he saw something move. It was some kind of bird pokegirl, one of the many quadrupedal breeds that had wings instead of arms. She stood close to five feet tall and had yellow feathers on her head with green feathers on her body and black wing feathers. She’d stood up to look around for possible predators, and, upon seeing none, went back to feeding on something he couldn’t see. Another one stood up not to far from the first and gave a raucous call.
Scheherazade burst from the brush and raced at them. The two Budgtit sprang into the air, but she grabbed the wing of one of them and spun, using her greater strength to jerk her prey from the air and slam it face first into a tree. As it bounced back, she punched it in the back of the skull with the pokeball she held. Around her, a dozen more Budgtit took to the air and fled with the first one.
The Dire Wolf’s eyes narrowed as her ears went flat. She snapped a heavy branch off a nearby tree and hurled it at the fleeing pokegirls. At the top of its arc, it suddenly accelerated hard as she used her telekinesis to drive the improvised spear through the torso of her target.
The Budgtit screamed and fell from the sky. Keeping a wary eye on the retreating bird pokegirls in case someone decided to come to this one’s aid, Scheherazade jogged up and pokeballed her. Then she returned to collect the first pokeball and headed for him. Kerrik got up and hobbled to meet her.
She cocked her head. Are you doing ok?
“No, I’m not. The fucking blisters hurt like hell. Breaking in new boots is always such a pain.” He’d decided to hike as far as he could to speed the process along and then have Scheherazade heal the blisters to shorten the pain he’d have to endure while the boots accommodated themselves to his feet. Then they’d discovered something fun about healing spells. When used to heal wounds, they returned the injured flesh to its original form. That meant calluses didn’t form, which meant he’d hiked that whole day and hurt like hell to no purpose. Now they just dabbed the blisters with antiseptic laced with a local painkiller every evening. In a couple more days he’d be fine and his boots would fit like a second skin. “I tried projecting to you. I take it you didn’t hear me?”
She shook her head. “No, I didn’t. We’ll have to practice that whenever we can.” She handed him one of the pokeballs. “Here’s the one I didn’t cripple. You could tame her and add her to the harem tonight.”
He looked at the pokeball. “My family owned a commercial chicken farm while I was growing up. We had almost twenty thousand chickens at a time. I also had a live-in girlfriend who had birds. It turns out I’m very sensitive to bird dander. I don’t quite hate birds, but I want to fuck one about as much as I’d like to pound nails into my skull. We sell them both.” He frowned. “Will a healing cycle remove the branch from the one you impaled?”
She nodded. “It will. With them, you’ve got five pokegirls you don’t want and none that you do. Just how picky are you?”
“I kept you, didn’t I? That must make me very picky about where I put my dick.” He grinned at her puzzled look and headed for the cave, whistling softly.
She caught up with him easily. “What kinds of pokegirls would you be willing to keep?”
“Why do I need more pokegirls? I’m trying to figure out a way to get my ass home, not set up shop here.”
“I’m worried I can’t protect you and hunt at the same time. I’d really like two harem sisters so we have one to protect you while I have one to hunt with.”
“Bloody hell.” He rubbed his forehead. “All the free pussy in the world and I had to get a Jewish grandmother.”
“What does that mean? It doesn’t sound like a compliment.”
He sighed. “It wasn’t, and I apologize for it. I shouldn’t have said it.”
She stopped in front of him, standing stiffly with her tail drooping behind her. “Do you feel you should get rid of me?”
“And that’s the fucking problem. I know that tamers just fucking dump the pokegirls they don’t want. I know that’s the way things work here. Well, it just so happens that I don’t think that way and I’m not going to do so. We broke bread and shared a bed. That should damned well mean something. It certainly does to me. I can’t just fuck a pokegirl, wake up her mind and then sell her at auction. I can’t do it, which means I’m going to be very, very careful about what pokegirls I decide I’m willing to be responsible for. If the rest of the world, including you, thinks otherwise, you can all go hang. I don’t do it to human women and I’m not going to do it to a pokegirl.”
She frowned and cocked her head curiously. “You’re serious.”
“As a fucking heart attack.”
“You curse a lot.”
He chuckled. “That I do. The result of a depraved childhood.”
“Don’t you mean deprived?”
“I know the English language pretty well. I used the word I wanted to.”
“Why did you call me a Jewish grandmother?”
“You’re nagging me about settling down with a nice pokegirl or nine. That’s what the stereotypical Jewish grandmother does. Of course, non-Jewish grandmothers do it too.”
She blinked and her ears flicked. “I am not nagging you.”
“Yes, you are.”
Her lip curled slightly and she got a devilish look in her eyes. “Am not.”
He smiled slightly. “Are too.”
She laughed and licked his face. “Am not.” She looked surprised when he took her by the shoulders and suddenly wiped his face clean against the fur of her breasts.
“Are too.” He grinned. “Dee too.”
She looked blank. “What?”
“It was a pun. R2-D2. You know, the droid from Star Wars?” He sighed. “Of course you have no clue what I’m talking about.”
“If you let me in your mind, you could show me.” She winced at the wary look that flashed across his face. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have suggested it. I know the Limbecs tried to take your mind over.”
She started to turn away when he took her by the hand and tugged her to a stop. “No, you’re right. You trust me, so I should trust you. After all, your breed is known for its loyalty and I know it’s important for telepaths to be able to communicate with their tamers. I’ll try, but if you even start to hurt, please stop immediately.”
Her ears pricked up. “Now?”
“We’ll wait until we get back to the cave.” He sighed. “I should make you wait until we get back to Dundalk so I can take you for healing if you get injured. We have no potions, nothing that I can use to heal you since we were too broke to buy any. Talk about being a piss poor tamer.”
“You’re a starting tamer and they usually start out broke. That’s why we’re out here catching pokegirls to sell.” She met his gaze evenly. “And the larger your harem, the more powerful pokegirls we can take down without harm. More powerful pokegirls sell for much more than these common ones.”
“I am well aware of how pokegirl economics works, especially here in the Blue League.” Kerrik frowned and walked around her towards the cave. “Come on. We’ll go to Dublin and put these girls up for sale. Once they’re gone, we’ll buy some healing potions so you can try to climb inside my skull without me worrying as much about your brains dribbling out your ears.”
She fell in slightly behind him. “You don’t want to take them to Dundalk?”
“We won’t go back to Dundalk until we go to take the tradesman’s test. I don’t want to go to the same place twice in a row. The Goths are looking for me, remember? If they know anything about me, then they’ll know that this is the best place to look for me. They’ve got agents in every league, including this one. I knew I should have found a way to ban them from here when I wrote the Blue League Field Guide. I wanted to use some kind of magic field that made their pointy heads explode when they entered it. But noooo, I had to listen to someone else’s reasoning and let them be here too. Well, hell.” He shrugged. “Boo hoo, spilt milk and life goes on.”
Behind him, Scheherazade stopped and stared at his back as he continued on towards the cave. She shivered suddenly and then moved to catch up.
***
“Halt!” A man leaped out in the road and pointed at them. “Give me your possessions and I’ll let you go.” A reddish furred pokegirl stood next to him. Kerrik reached down and activated his pokedex’s record function without looking down.
She was one of the fox types and as she moved forward to stand directly in front of her tamer, she grinned hungrily at Kerrik and Scheherazade. “You’d better do what he wants or I’ll burn you to a crisp.”
Kerrik closed his eyes for a moment, letting fear cross his face as he forced his mind to relax and pictured the Dire Wolf’s face in his mind’s eye. He intends to kill me and take you if I surrender. Ignore the Vixxen and go for the tamer. Hold him hostage so she’ll surrender or kill him if she won’t. He opened his eyes had held up his hands, palms out.
Scheherazade gave a soft start and rotated an ear to focus on him. I heard you that time. Distract them if you can without getting hurt.
Kerrik slumped like he’d mentally given up. “I don’t have much, buddy. Look, show me a bit of kindness and let me go.”
The Vixxen grinned and advanced. “You drop the pack this instant.” Her body burst into flames as she used ignite. “Or you’re dead meat.”
Scheherazade teleported, exiting behind the tamer. She grabbed him by the back of the neck with one hand and snaked her other hand between his legs to rip out the crotch of his pants with her claws. She reached inside the hole to take him by the groin. She lifted and squeezed in the same motion. The tamer screamed.
The Vixxen whirled around. Kerrik ran for the woods as she hissed at the Dire Wolf, who glared and spoke in a voice like hammered iron. “Stand down, or I’ll castrate him here and now.”
The Vixxen froze for a second before spinning around to face Kerrik. “You hurt him and I’ll,” she broke off with a wail when she realized her target was gone. “Where is your slimy tamer?”
Scheherazade twisted the tamer’s testicles and his screams became high and thin. “Surrender, bitch!”
The Vixxen bowed her head, her tail and ears drooping. “You win. Just don’t hurt him.” She stood submissively while the Dire Wolf pulled her pokeball from the tamer’s belt and returned her to it.
The Dire Wolf looked around with a slightly anxious look. “Kerrik!”
“I’m here.” He crawled out from under a bush, wincing. “Damn, those thorns are sharp. It’s funny that I didn’t notice that on my way in. I must have had other things on my mind.”
She gestured with the now sobbing man. “What do I do with him?”
“Did you twist his nuts off?”
“I don’t think so, although they may have ruptured.”
Kerrik eyed the man. “He won’t bleed out from that and any infection he might get will take days to kill him. Strip him nude. We’ll tie him up. While I wanted to walk the full way to Dublin, we’ll fly from here on. We’ll turn him in to the authorities and see if there’s a bounty on this jackass.”
“How did you know he intended to kill you?”
Kerrik started to say something and stopped. “I’m not sure. I just know that things were about to go very bad and if nothing changed I would die.” He snorted. “I guess I’m not quite ready to cash in just yet.”
“Of course you’re not. You have to live so you can keep me safe.”
“Me? Keep you safe? Considering that attacks that’ll convert me into mulch will just muss your fur, I think you’ve got that backwards.”
“You protect me,” she insisted.
“Whatever. I can see I’m not going to get anywhere in that discussion.”
“No, you’re not. What about his pokegirls?”
“The Vixxen was ready to turn me into flambé, and they’re notoriously unreliable if they feel they need sex more than to they need to do the job at hand. I don’t need a bodyguard who thinks a loud fuck is a good way to pass the time while waiting for you to finish with a feral. The noise, motion and scents will all draw anything that you miss right to my fragile carcass.”
Scheherazade gave a sigh of relief. “I agree completely. However, he has two other pokegirls.” She held up the belt she’d just stripped from their prisoner to display the three pokeballs that hung from it.
He gave her a half glare. “Did you just wait for me to waste my good argument against the Vixxen so I can’t also use it against any other pokegirls that he has?”
She wagged her tail and gave him an innocent look. “Would I do that?”
“I haven’t forgotten you’re part Celestial. A bunch of them, if given a choice between manipulating the people around them or breathing would have to think about it. Granted, a lot of that is my fault, but still it’s currently fact.”
“Your fault?”
He looked down at his hands. “I took the Celestial Alliance and added humanity and politics to it. It made them into an organization which felt that it had to help mankind whether mankind wanted it or not. Before that, it was just some vague do-gooder club for pokegirls who like to pretend they don’t ever have sex and make bad predictions about the future.”
Scheherazade’s eyes bugged, but she calmed her expression before he looked up again. “Is there any other possible reason as to how you could know what they are like without you making them that way?”
He shrugged. “Well, there’s also the theory that everyone who writes has the ability to see across dimensions and that what they write about is what they see on some other world. I suppose that one sounds less presumptuous than me saying that I wrote it and lo, it became so.” He frowned and turned to point at a flat patch of ground. “And lo, eight double Whataburgers with cheese and fries with large chocolate malts became so.” When nothing happened, he laughed. “Well, if I am a god, I’m not very good at it.”
“You’re starting to make me nervous.”
“Yeah, well you can’t be nearly as nervous as I would have been if that dinner had actually appeared. Put idiot boy on the ground and take his hands.” She did and he knelt next to the prisoner to begin undoing his shirt. “Well, let’s get Mr. Happy here taken care of so we can get rid of him as soon as possible.”
The man glared at him. “My name is Jared O’Hanlon and you’re making a big mistake.”
“If you speak again, I’m going to gag you. I intend to keep your socks, so I’ll probably use your underwear.”
“Bastard.”
Kerrik looked at Scheherazade as he opened Jared’s pants. “Are you literate?”
She shook her head. “Sadly, no.”
“We’ll have to work on that. If you were, I was going to ask you to start a shopping list and put handcuffs or police cable ties for prisoners on it.”
“Hey! I’m talking to you, prick!”
“I’m sorry, sir. I’ll try to remember it for you.”
Kerrik shrugged. “I’ll start a list after I finish with Jack here. Just keep holding his hands.” He finished opening the pants and moved down to remove the man’s boots and socks.
“My name is Jared!” He began struggling as Kerrik pulled his pants down his legs. “Stop that, you fag!”
Kerrik ignored him and stripped Jared’s underwear off. “Eww, skid marks.” He moved up and sat on Jared’s chest. “Keep a good grip on his arms.” He drew his knife and pressed the tip under Jared’s eye, just above the socket. The prisoner froze. “Open your mouth. If you close it before I’m done, I’ll scoop that eye out like a melon ball.” Jared didn’t move and Kerrik drove the knife in enough to draw blood. The prisoner opened his mouth and Kerrik deliberately turned the underwear inside out before cramming it completely into the man’s mouth. Jacob turned green and gagged as he tried to spit it out. “If you throw up, you’ll probably choke to death.”
Scheherazade gave him a mildly disapproving look. “That wasn’t very nice.”
“He forfeited any right to nice when he decided to kill me and rape you. I’d be justified in cutting his throat and leaving him for the worms.”
“He needs to be punished. What would killing him solve?”
“I’d know he’ll never do it again, that’s what.” Kerrik used the knife to slice the legs off of Jared’s pants and cut them into strips. “Flip him over and let’s finish this up. If I sit here too much longer he might start to like it.”
***
Scheherazade landed gently and dropped Jared like a sack of potatoes before carefully letting her tamer go. “The Blue League prefers for pokegirls to be dressed, so I need to put on some clothes.” She shrugged out of her backpack and quickly put on a dark blue thigh length skirt and matching bikini top. Kerrik remembered seeing them in the pile of clothes he’d bought in Dundalk. “Would you reconsider keeping one of the pokegirls we salvaged?”
“No, I won’t. Look, if it makes you feel better, we’ll go back to Dundalk early and find out where the closest ranch is. I’ve still got a chit for that starter and we’ll see what they have to offer in the way of useful pokegirls.”
“Aren’t there ranches here in Dublin?”
“Yeah. One gives bug pokegirls and the other gives out vulpine and canine pokegirls. I don’t want any bugs except maybe a Ladyien and I’ve already got the best canine breed there is.”
“You flatter me.” She picked up Jared and slung him over her back. He whined until she shook him slightly. “Although I must admit you are correct. As for the ranch idea, thank you.”
“I want you to be happy too, my lady.” Kerrik stepped behind her and poked Jared in the stomach with his finger. “Do you have to shit or piss? If you lie to me and then you make Scheherazade nasty and filthy, I can almost guarantee that you’ll regret it.” When the prisoner shook his head wildly, Kerrik nodded. “Good. You stay calm and we should part ways soon.” He frowned and dug Jared’s shirt from his pack. Quickly, he tied it around the man’s waist. “There, now the police won’t say anything about indecent exposure. Scheherazade, I think we’ll walk from here. As soon as we see someone who looks like they have a clue, we’ll ask them for the closest police station.”
When they walked into the Garda station, a single Officerjenny sat at a desk. She looked them over and shook her head. “This should be a good story.”
“Not really. This is Mr. Jared O’Hanlon. We met out in the wilderness and he tried to kill me. I figure he’s been a bad boy before and I hope there’s a bounty. If not, we’ll be dropping him off and going on our way.” He motioned and Scheherazade put the prisoner on a hard bench.
The Officerjenny’s eyebrows rose. “And just how did he try to kill you?”
“I’ve got the recording right here, but what he did was tell me to give him all my things and my single pokegirl or else his Vixxen would turn me into a crispy critter. Even if he’d been truthful, which I really doubt, it would have left me alone in the wilderness and completely unarmed.”
She didn’t look convinced. “And just how did you escape Mr. O’Hanlon’s clutches?”
“I’m older and sneakier than he is. Meaner, too.” Kerrik rolled his eyes. “Look, with all due respect, either I’m telling the truth or I just kidnapped this poor fellow and then brought him here because I must really like being in jail or I’m a complete moron who has no idea what’s going to happen to me if I’m guilty. Which sounds more plausible to you?”
The police pokegirl came around the desk as a smile flickered around her lips. “Considering your attitude toward the police, the moron idea may need looked into.”
He shrugged. “You’d already decided I was an idiot who couldn’t recognize a death threat. I tend to respond badly to preconceptions, especially wrong ones. I apologize if it came across as flippant.”
The Officerjenny looked O’Hanlon over. “What’s that in his mouth?”
“His underwear.”
“You gagged him with his underwear?”
“I warned him first. He decided he wanted to keep insulting us more than he cared about the taste.” He raised a hand as she reached for it. “Um, I’d use a glove.”
“Why?”
“He didn’t listen to his mother when she recommended he change them every day.”
The Jenny’s face twitched as she tried not to laugh. She went back to her desk and pulled on some disposable gloves from a box. She carefully pulled the skivvies from Jared’s mouth. He gagged and pursed his lips. “You spit on my floor and I’ll make you lick it back up.” He blinked and swallowed heavily. The Officerjenny smiled cheerfully. “Good boy. Now I’m going to take your DNA and then we’ll put you in a holding cell while I review his video records. Do you have anything to say about the situation?” When he shook his head sullenly she nodded. “Very well, Mr. O’Hanlon.” She looked at Scheherazade. “The water cooler is over there. Give him some water to drink.”
The Dire Wolf looked at Kerrik, who shook his head. “You watch him. I’ll get the water.”
“Yes sir.”
“You don’t trust me to stop him if he tries something?” The Officerjenny’s voice was cool.
“It doesn’t matter if I do. If he’s got some weird blood trait or knows magic, you’ll be distracted doing his DNA when he gets started. At that point milliseconds count and there isn’t a prize for being almost fast enough.” He filled a cup with water and came back. “Do you want us to untie him?”
“Yeah. Untie me right now. I have rights.”
Kerrik leaned down until they were almost face to face. “Look, punk, you’re not in her custody yet and the underwear is right over there.”
The Officerjenny was getting out her DNA analyzer. “Stop threatening him, sir.” She frowned. “What is your name?”
“Kerrik Wolf.”
“Well, Mr. Wolf, stop threatening him. He is in my custody right now; he’s just not under arrest yet. Mr. O’Hanlon, please shut your mouth.” She swabbed O’Hanlon’s mouth and went back to her desk. “Where is his pokedex, Mr. Wolf?”
Kerrik dug it out of his backpack and put it on her desk. “Here is mine, too.”
“Thank you.” She plugged the analyzer into a cable that was attached to her computer. She typed a couple of keys and looked up. “Well, Mr. O’Hanlon, you are wanted here in Dublin for assault with a pokegirl and theft. Unfortunately for you, Mr. Wolf, there isn’t a bounty on him, but we’re very grateful that you brought him in to us.”
“I suppose you’re welcome, officer.”
She picked up Kerrik’s pokedex and plugged it in. “While that downloads, let’s put Mr. O’Hanlon in his new home.”
After Jared was safely in the holding cell and had been given a canary yellow jumpsuit decorated with lime green stripes to wear, she returned to her desk. She hesitated only briefly when she saw the flashing red icon in the corner of her display and touched it to open up a window. Her eyes flicked up. “We may have some questions for you, Mr. Wolf. Where are you staying?”
Something changed in Kerrik’s demeanor and Scheherazade became alert as he smiled easily. “I just got to town, officer. Can you recommend a place?”
“The Foxx and Hound is just down the street and is very comfortable. There’s a pokegirl center two blocks past it if you’d rather stay there.”
“Hotels don’t have beds with plastic sheets. I think I’ll try the Foxx and Hound.”
The police pokegirl made a notation and closed the window. “I think you’ll like it there, sir. Now, where is the rest of Mr. O’Hanlon’s gear?”
Kerrik blinked. “Other gear?”
“He was out in the wilderness, right? That implies he has camping gear and other sundries.”
She smiled when he looked astonished. “I never thought to go looking for any. It looks like you’re right. I am a moron.” He dropped his voice to a mutter. “I need to think more like an adventurer and look for loot.” His voice returned to normal. “Counting the Vixxen he threatened me with, I did find three pokegirls on him. Can I keep them?”
“I’m afraid not, Mr. Wolf. If he’s found innocent, they’re his property. You can put in a claim to them, if you’d like. If he’s convicted, and from what I see he probably will be, they’ll go to you.”
“I think I want to make that claim. If nothing else, I can sell them and then I’ll know they won’t be used for pokepower.”
“You don’t like the idea behind pokepower?”
“I don’t have a problem with it being used for criminals, but I do have an issue with random confiscations being murdered so you have electricity. They didn’t do anything to deserve being executed by the leagues. The only thing they’re guilty of is trusting their tamers to take care of them.”
“That’s an interesting attitude, Mr. Wolf. I’ll put in your salvage claim on Mr. O’Hanlon’s pokegirls.” She smiled. “You don’t need to stay around while I review your video records. They’ll only add more charges to Mr. O’Hanlon.”
“Thanks.” He glanced at Scheherazade. “Let’s go.”
Once outside, the Dire Wolf looked around before following him as they walked down the street. “What happened in there?”
“I don’t know. One second everything was fine and then next she became some kind of potential threat.”
“Are we going to stay at the Foxx and Hound?”
He gave her a look. “Not a chance in hell. I told her we’d be staying in town because I got the distinct impression that if I said anything else we’d be staying at the jail whether we wanted to or not. We put the pokegirls up for sale, get the healing potions we came for and we leave. I wouldn’t be able to afford to stay at a hotel after getting the potions, anyways. We’ll be flat broke at that point.” He frowned for a moment. “Do you want a healing cycle at the pokegirl center? It would mean having to put you in a pokeball, but you’re still too thin from staying with our former guests and a healing cycle might help that.”
“To be honest, I had wondered why you haven’t already put me in one, and yet was hesitant to ask.”
“What purpose would it serve? I don’t have a PPHU. Without one, the only reason to be able to put you into a pokeball would be so I could win any argument by making you stop arguing with me.”
“You could do that by merely telling me to be quiet.”
He snickered. “If that’s true, you’ll be the first woman I’ve ever known who’ll do so.”
“It’s still true. Pokegirls obey.”
“Most pokegirls obey as much as their tamer wants them to. The rest are usually given a pass for being disobedient because it’s considered to be part of their breed makeup. I don’t want you to be blindly obedient to me. I don’t want anyone to be that obedient. I make just as many mistakes as anyone else. Hopefully you’ll help me catch them before they get us hurt.”
Her tail flicked sideways. “Then I have to help you now. A pokeball would help you to keep me from dying. You could use it to recover me if I am seriously injured or if you’re smart enough, you could use it to tactically deploy me from one place to another during a fight.”
He nodded. “That all makes sense. However, I have one last question. Do you want to go in one?”
“Not particularly. I don’t like wearing clothes either, but I do it when necessary. I would appreciate if you’d not put me up without reason. I cannot protect you from inside a pokeball.”
“There’s a way to see outside a pokeball while inside and to leave one whenever you want.”
Scheherazade looked surprised. “I don’t suppose you know how it’s done?”
“I’ve never examined the phenomenon that closely, but I understand it can be self taught. Nobody taught Ginevra how to do it.”
“Then whenever I’m in a pokeball, I’ll be working to learn how it’s done.” She reached out and touched his cheek as her blue eyes met his gray-green ones. “Now you need to pokeball me, before we find more reasons for me to remain out.”
Kerrik pulled an empty ball from his belt. “Too late, but you’re right.” He touched the ball to her stomach and she disappeared into the beam. The capture tone sounded just as soon as she was gone. “That was quick. She didn’t fight at all.” He pressed the button and released her.
She appeared and looked at the pokeball he still held. “I’ve been in pokeballs before. I remember you purchasing that ball at the store in Dundalk. What is different about it?”
“It doesn’t have a conditioning cycle. I didn’t think it would be fair to you. If I add other pokegirls to my family, then they’ll go in the same kind of pokeball.” He smiled sadly. “A pokegirl’s loyalty will be freely given to me or I don’t want it at all. I certainly don’t want one who has some kind of pseudo loyalty to me just because a pokeball is constantly whispering it to her.”
“It may make it hard to initially tame some pokegirls that you might otherwise want.”
“If they’re feral, they’ll initially go into a normal pokeball. After all, I’m unlikely to look at one and think she’ll do just because of her looks.”
Her voice was soft. “You are likely to be that way, aren’t you? It would be easier for us if you did think more along those lines.”
“Tough. I’ve always been able to find enough willing women in the world that I’ve never had to consider rape. I’m not going to start considering it now.”
“Hey, you!” A young man came running up. “I saw you just capture that pokegirl! I challenge you to a salvage match for her!”
“I’ll have you know that her old pokeball got broken and I was just putting her into a new one. Besides, do I look young enough to be a tamer?”
The young man grinned. “Hah! You can’t fool me. I scanned you and your pokedex says you’re a tamer.”
Kerrik changed tactics. “Did it also mention that I only have one pokegirl? I’m not going to wager my only pokegirl on the chance she can kick your pokegirl’s ass.”
“I want a battle!”
Kerrik pointed in a random direction. “Go out of town and you’ll find ferals to fight. You catch them and they’re yours. Then you train them up and hit the towns with gyms.”
“I don’t want to catch ferals. They’re not worth my trouble.”
“Then you go to the Pot ‘O Gold and you battle there.”
“I want to battle you. I want that Foxxsea.”
Kerrik gave him a disdainful look. “Life is full of disappointment. Here’s one for you. We are not going to come to a meeting of the minds.”
“I’ll wager two of my pokegirls against her!”
Kerrik’s eyes narrowed. “I said no. You can’t set any conditions that will make me battle my pokegirl against yours.” He turned away. “Come on.” Scheherazade fell in behind him.
“Coward!”
Kerrik stopped and turned around. “You got me. I’m terrified of you. Right now I’m shaking in my boots at your awe inducing self. I’m so afraid that if I could, I’d run away right now, but I’m too scared to run. I guess I’ll have to walk instead.” He returned to heading for the pokegirl center.
“Fucking bastard!”
Kerrik waved a hand behind him. “Yeah, yeah, yeah. Whatever.”
They walked in silence for a few minutes before Scheherazade couldn’t contain herself any longer. “You did not think I could beat his pokegirl?”
He glanced at her. “I don’t really care if you can or not. Your self appointed job is to protect me, not to engage in street brawls. They’re not like the real thing.”
She blinked and her ears tilted curiously. “How so?”
“In a real fight, the goal is to kill your opponent or hurt them so badly that they stop bothering you. You don’t worry about whether or not your target is going to get out of the way and make you kill her tamer or burn through a wall and turn some civilians into collateral damage. I don’t want you learning to fight at any power level other than full power. The Goths and their minions won’t and so you can’t afford to.”
“You don’t care if I kill civilians accidentally?”
“When I die, my world ends. It doesn’t matter what happens to any other world, mine stops when I die. I will end it prematurely to save someone who is important to me. Here and now, you are the only person who is on that list. If, to keep me alive, you have to burn some hapless civilians down, I’ll feel bad about it and I’ll wonder if there could have been another way to do what needed to be done.” He looked at her to make sure she was paying attention. “For a while. As for some tamer who is too stupid to get out of the way when his pokegirl is dumb enough to dodge at the wrong time? As far as I’m concerned, that’s natural selection in action and you shouldn’t be put to death for improving the human race a tiny bit by removing his genes before he can reproduce. However, the locals don’t agree with that, so I’m unwilling to put you in a situation where you might have to accidentally kill someone.”
“You don’t think of yourself as a Blue?”
“I only do when I’m sad. Otherwise I’m stranger in a strange world, even if I’m not Valentine Michael Smith. Pity, too. This world could use Fair Witnesses.” He stopped in front of the door to the pokegirl center and began reading signs. “Let’s see. No notices that pokegirls can’t be out in the center. No taming outside the rooms, that only makes sense. No battling or challenges inside the pokegirl center, and finally, all pokegirls working inside are civil service animals and are not available for taming by the unwashed.”
The Dire Wolf’s mouth dropped. “Does it really say that?”
“What, the unwashed bit? No, it says civilian tamers or tradesmen, but it means the peasants.” He pushed the door open. “Please stay close.”
A long line of tamers stood in front of the counter while a lone Nursejoy was talking with the one at the head of the line. Most of the tamers had a single pokegirl out, although one fellow was surrounded by six girls quietly talking around him. Kerrik shrugged and moved to the end. He dropped his voice to a whisper. “If we’re going to follow our plan, it might behoove us to invest in a literacy and speech T2.”
She whispered back. “We have a plan?”
“Of course we do. We’re going to get you healed and then go to the McCloud Ranch and see about buying that extremely rare Hoarfoxx they’re practically giving away because they don’t have the facilities to keep an ice pokegirl.” He smiled slightly as the head of the tamer in front of him tilted slightly to bring one ear more in line with their conversation. “She’s a new threshold and just come of age. They’re not telling anyone about her. I wouldn’t have known except that I’m friends with their veterinarian.” His smile spread when the tamer in front of him made a show of looking at his watch and then hurriedly headed outside with his pokegirl in tow. Several other tamers with pokegirls who happened to have enhanced hearing were right behind him.
“That was mean.” Scheherazade giggled softly. “Very mean.”
He moved up to take their places. “They’ll come back later. I still want that T2. You are my maharani and you need to be able to read.”
“Yes, I do.” Her ears canted. “If only so I’ll know when you’re playing games with me. What’s a maharani?”
“Sorry, here they call them alphas. It means great queen.”
She was silent for a moment. “Could I be called the maharani instead of alpha?”
He smiled slightly. “I’d prefer to call you that myself.”
Two arguments with the Nursejoy later and one idiot who asked her for a taming and was told to leave, Kerrik stood in front of the counter. The Nursejoy ran a hand over her hair to pull the bits that had come out of her ponytail back from her face and gave him a tired look. “How can I help you, sir?”
He already had the ferals' pokeballs out and put them in the holder on the counter. “I’m Tamer Wolf and I’ve got six pokegirls that need healing and cleaning cycles. I don’t want any taming cycles.” He returned Scheherazade to her pokeball and added it to the pile. “And that’s all I want.” He smiled broadly. “Would you like me to go sit down while they’re running so you can deal with the fellow behind me, or should I stand here like a lump and block the line just like those other tamers did?”
Her eyes twinkled suddenly. “I’d appreciate it if you’d have a seat, sir. I’ll need your pokedex, too.”
He glanced at the nametag on her chest. “No problem, Pamela.” He handed his dex to her and headed for the most comfortable looking chair in the room. “Thank you very much.”
She blinked. “You’re very welcome, sir. Lynn, take these back for healing and cleaning. No taming. Priority two, please.” Then she turned to the next tamer as a Titmouse picked up the tray and headed through the door that housed the myriad mysteries of a pokegirl center. “How may I help you, sir?”
One of the things he’d learned in his life was how to sleep anytime the opportunity was presented and he was dozing when a gentle hand touched his arm. His eyes opened to see Lynn, the Titmouse. “Sir, here are your pokegirls and pokedex.” Her ears flicked and he squelched an urge to stroke them to see if they were as soft as the ones on the mice he’d raised.
“Thank you, Lynn.” She flushed with pleasure as he took them.
“Have a nice day, sir.”
“Thank you. You too.” He frowned as she glided away and turned the balls over. “Crap.” He got out his pokedex and scanned each of the balls to find Scheherazade’s. He pushed the release button and stared.
She’d been fully healed and her fur was thick and glossy. Suddenly full breasts threatened to escape from the bikini top that had easily concealed them before and her skirt was very tight across her hips and generous ass. However, everything was in proportion to her now muscular body. When he didn’t speak, she cocked her head. “What’s the matter?”
“You are a teenager’s wet dream.”
She looked down at herself and back up at him. “Not yours?”
“No, but it’s only because I actually get to be with you.”
A look of satisfaction filled her eyes. “Good. I want you to want me.”
“You wish has been granted.” He got to his feet. “We’ll need to get you some new clothes.”
“I want those potions first. Clothes can wait until you get paid for the ferals.”
“Then let’s find a workstation and set them up for auction.” That didn’t take long and when he was done, Kerrik went back up to the main desk. Pamela was busy with another tamer, but Lynn came over. “Jumping in line, sir?” She smiled.
“I may well be, and if you tell me I am, I’ll go back and wait my turn patiently. I’ve put these pokegirls up for auction, but I don’t have storage rights and I’m worried that I’ll be in the wilderness when the auction concludes. Can you put them in holding for me so their new owners can get them promptly?”
Her smile spread. “I’d be more than happy to, sir, and thank you for not bothering Pamela with such a simple request.”
“Well, thank you for helping me out, Lynn. I really appreciate this. I hope you have a nice day.”
She bobbed her head. “And you too, sir.” Then she was gone.
He looked at Scheherazade. “Well, let’s go find out how many potions I can buy with the money I’ve got. After that, we’re going back to where we met Jared and go looking for his camp. I may be a moron, but I can learn.”
***
Scheherazade put him down after the teleport and reached behind her back. Her ears went flat. “I can’t untie my top. Could you do it, please?”
He stepped behind her. “No wonder, not only is it so tight it’s almost cutting into the flesh, but it’s buried in your fur. Hold on a sec.” He worked for a moment and she sighed with relief as it came loose. “There. Now for the skirt.”
She winced. “Ow. My tail doesn’t bend that way.”
“It’s not going to go. I’ll have to cut it.”
She looked over her shoulder as he drew his knife. “I hope you’re talking about the skirt and not my tail.”
“I wouldn’t dare harm such a pretty tail.” The skirt fluttered to the ground. “And now you’ll need new clothes.”
“Oh, that’s so much better.” She slowly turned in place. “I don’t see his campsite. Are we going to wander around and hope we find it?”
“I don’t see why we should have to.” He dropped his pack and pulled out a sock. “Here, sniff this and find his trail.”
She stared at the sock as her ears flicked. “I don’t know if I’m more annoyed that I, the being with the enhanced senses, didn’t think of this, or because you did.”
“Don’t worry about it. We’re supposed to back up each other.”
Her nose wrinkled as she scented on the sock. “You will wash those before you wear them, right? He stinks.”
“You can never have too many pairs of dry socks in the wilderness, but yes, I’ll wash them before they go on my body.” He sniffed the sock. “Whew, that’s rank. If he smells that strongly, I should almost be able to track him.”
Scheherazade went down on her hands and knees to cast about where Jared had been standing. “Are you looking at my ass?”
“Oh, yes. It’s very nice.”
“While I appreciate it, you need to be watching our surroundings.”
He sighed loudly. “Take all my fun away. Very well, I’m trying to pay attention to everything except your fine ass.”
“Is it hard?”
“Indeed I am.”
She looked over her shoulder at him and giggled. “That’s not what I meant, but I see you are.”
“Eyes and nose on the road, wench.” She nodded and went back to work.
Eventually she did cut Jared’s scent and began following it while Kerrik kept an eye on the woods around them. The trail led them away from the road and deep into the trees. She slowed and came to her feet. “That’s it up ahead. There’s a pokegirl in the camp.”
“Think she’s a sentry?”
“Considering that the Catgirl is trying to open a can of beans with her claws, I doubt it. Should I catch her?”
“Why not?” He handed her an empty pokeball. “Be careful.”
He watched her move forward silently until she disappeared into the underbrush. Then he eased forward to examine the camp. A pokegirl was shaking a can while holding it near her ear. She was a gray with light white stripes running over her body. “Shit,” he muttered softly. He pictured Scheherazade in his mind. Shay, the pokegirl you’re hunting is not a Catgirl. That is a Warcat and she’s a fighting type.
Shay? I like that name. I’ll be careful. Should I still catch her?
Warcats have shit for ranged attacks so don’t close with her unless you have to. We could only afford a single P-Med dispenser of heal potions, so be very careful.
I will.
As he watched, the Warcat staggered as bright streamers seeped out of her body, swirled around her and crept into the woods immediately behind her. She recovered, whirled and charged in that direction, her snarl ripping through the air as she pursued her as yet unseen foe.
The ground shook hard enough to knock Kerrik off his feet. He grabbed the tree next to him and pulled himself back up in time to see the shrieking Warcat get blasted through several trees in a spray of wood and leaves. She hit hard and clambered upright just as a bolt of lightning struck her in the chest with a loud crack.
Kerrik blinked away afterimages from the bolt as the Warcat crashed to the ground again. She rolled to her feet and fled away from her opponent. Scheherazade stepped out of the trees and looked around. “Well, hell.” She lifted off to hover and then shot after her prey.
He peered at the pile of stuff next to the tent. “That looks really inviting.” He glanced upwards and grinned. “You won’t get me that easily.” He put his back against a tree trunk and waited for the Dire Wolf to return.
She was back a few minutes later and landed in front of him with the pokeball held out. “Here she is.”
He ignored the ball to examine a deep slice down her right arm. Blood trickled down to drip from her clenched fist. “She hadn’t touched you the last I saw. What happened?”
“The bitch ambushed me. My healing will take care of it.”
One of his eyebrow rose. “You said bitch.”
She shrugged and winced. “You’re rubbing off on me. Besides, I called the Vixxen a bitch too. Trash talk is part of battling.”
He took the pokeball. “Now heal your wound or I’ll get the dispenser.” He waited as her wound glowed and sealed shut, leaving the flesh behind unmarked. “Come on, I’ll wash the blood off.”
Her ears went halfway back. “I don’t need you to mother me. I’m fine.”
“I know you are, but I intend to bed you tonight and I don’t want blood in the sleeping bag.”
She blinked and her ears came up. “Oh. Okay, then.”
***
Kerrik looked at the pile of fabric in disgust. “That stupid fucker sliced up the extra tents and the Warcat trashed his.” He’d cleaned her up and now they were looting Jared’s camp.
Scheherazade opened up a small sack. “This is gross. I found this in the tiny freezer he’s got. It’s full of fingers.”
“Really? Hand it over.” He blinked. “Sorry, bad pun.”
She gave him the sack. “What do you want with it?”
“I think it may explain the six pokedexes we found.” He reached over and picked up a pokedex. Then he dumped the bag out in front of him. “They are kind of gross. And each one has a different color of fingernail polish on it.” He turned them over and picked one up. “Aha.” He touched it to the pokedex he was holding. “This is how he got around the DNA lockouts on the pokedexes. The original owners are most likely dead.”
“Are we going to keep them?”
He put the fingers back in the sack. “No, we’re not. We’ll drop them off in Dundalk when we go back. Please put these back in that freezer.”
“We don’t have his ice type to keep it cold.” One of Jared’s pokegirls had been a Caphoochie. The other had been a Rhynodame, with the Vixxen as the third one.
“It’ll do for a few more days. So far the count is twenty three empty pokeballs, six empty P-Med dispensers, some canned food, a mostly ruined bag of pokechow, three ruined tents and six pokedexes with fingers from their owners in a small cooler. Not a very impressive haul for some master criminal. I can see why there wasn’t a bounty on him. After all he was staking out the ruins of a highway that nobody ever uses.”
Scheherazade picked up the tents one at a time and shook them to see if they’d missed anything. When she got to the ruins of Jared’s something made a long bulge when she shook it. She put the tent down and peeled the fabric apart to come up with a long wooden case. “We missed this.”
She handed it to Kerrik, who put it down on the ground and opened it. “Well, now, we’ve got a firearm.” He pulled it out and examined it. “It’s a shotgun.”
“I wonder why Jared didn’t have it with him.”
Kerrik pulled the bolt back and locked it open. He peered inside. “I think it’s probably because it is so filthy in here that it won’t fire. This thing is nasty.” He looked down and suddenly looked disgusted. “And there’s a cleaning kit in here, too. Jared must be as lazy as the day is long.”
“Can you get it working?”
“Probably. I’ll find out if there’s anything else wrong with it when I take it apart.” He put it back in the case and closed it up. “I guess that’s it. We’ll head back to the cave and get some rest.”
Her ears flicked. “I thought you were going to bed me?”
“Oh, I am. That’ll be why I’ll need the rest.”
***
Scheherazade squatted down next to him and reached out to touch his cheek. “It still looks pretty nasty. How do you feel?”
He looked over at her and smiled. The right side of his face, from his eye to his chin, was one huge purple bruise. “Your healing worked just fine. I don’t hurt at all. The only strangeness is that my new teeth are unworn, and so they don’t feel right at all. I’ll get used to them eventually.”
“I’m,” she broke off when he placed his hand on her muzzle.
“You’ve already apologized and I’ve already accepted it. It was an accident.” He grinned. “It just means that doggie style isn’t a very good idea with you. I should have considered the fact that you’re so strong that a good swing of your tail could break my cheek and jaw. You kept it still until the end.”
She looked down. “It was that last multiple orgasm when you came. I don’t know what you were hitting, but it felt really, really good and I couldn’t stay still.”
He stroked her face. “That’s quite the compliment. Since my goal is to make sure you usually feel that good, we’ll have to find a safer position.” He smirked. “Maybe next time we’ll put you on top.”
“I bet you’d like to watch that.” She got up. “I’ll catch something for breakfast. Do you have a request?”
“Not fish. Not for breakfast.” He tossed something in his mouth and chewed.
She blinked. “Why are you eating pokechow?”
“We had it, I was hungry and you eat it. That means I’m going to at least know how it tastes. It’s not that bad. It’s better than Alpo dry dog food.” He grinned. “I ate some on a dare.”
“It’s designed for pokegirls with various metabolisms to eat. You’ll be lucky if you don’t get the runs again.”
“I read the ingredient list. It’s got loads of fiber. Do you know we do not have a can opener and there wasn’t one with Jared’s crap?”
“I can open them. You only need to ask.”
“You were asleep and I didn’t want to wake you.” He snickered.
“What?”
He laughed. “You woof in your sleep. It’s so cute.”
Her face went stony. “I’ll catch you some rabbits.”
“Hey, it’s a lot cuter than my snoring. A girlfriend once compared it to a motorboat.”
She sniffed. “I like your snores. They’re not loud and it’s like having a vibrating pillow.”
He shook his head. “I suppose I deserved that.”
“Yes, you did.” She leaned down and licked his face. “I’ll be back as soon as I can, Kerrik.”
“And I’ll stay right here unless a feral chases me into the cave.”
“Will I be able to try to enter your mind today?”
He pulled the shotgun case over and opened it. “That’s the plan.” When she left, he was taking the weapon apart for cleaning.
About half an hour later she was back with several rabbits. “You’re naked again.”
“The solvent gets on everything. This way I only have to wash myself, not my clothes, too.”
“I think that makes sense.” She frowned and leaned over to sniff him. Suddenly she sneezed. “You stink.”
Kerrik wiped off his face. “Wolf snot. How did you know it’s just what I’ve always wanted? The stink is probably solvent. If I had a bucket, I would have soaked the metal parts in solvent. It would have been easier.” He shrugged. “When I’m done, you can take me back to that river and I’ll bathe.” They’d brought back one of the ruined tents for the fabric and he’d turned a lot of it into strips and patches for cleaning the shotgun.
“Did you get it clean?”
He smiled. “Of course I did. It just would have been easier if I could soak the parts. Eventually I’ll end up doing that anyways, but the shotgun should work just fine since I didn’t find anything else wrong with it. It was so filthy that the firing pin had jammed.” He nodded towards the reassembled weapon. “I put it back together and dry fired it a couple of times. I didn’t want to make any noise with it until after you’d returned.” He stretched. “I found fourteen rounds for it in the case. This thing should make me less of a target. It’s a semi-automatic twelve gauge shotgun with a fully rifled barrel. The rounds are sabot slug rounds and should make just about any pokegirl hit with them at least a little unhappy, depending on where I shoot her.”
She looked up from where she was skinning the rabbits. “If it’ll make you less likely to run away, I should bend the barrel into a circle now and get it over with.”
“Don’t you dare. I’m a good shot and it’ll let you hunt a little further afield without having to worry about me quite so much.”
“Nothing will make me worry about you less. You are my tamer and my general.”
Kerrik’s head came around. “What did you call me?”
She met his gaze evenly. “You are my general.”
“Your precognitive powers are coming online?”
She nodded. “I know that going to the ranch outside Dundalk is the right thing for us to do.”
He made a show of looking around. “We don’t have an Ocelolita, Shadowcat, or Cheshire around, right?” When she shook her head, he sighed. “That means I have the potential to be a powerful mage. Great, now the Order of Pendragon may decide to try to recruit me.”
“Would that be bad?”
“I did my military service. I’m not interested in doing that again, and the Order is most definitely a paramilitary organization. I don’t need them hounding me on top of the Sanctuary Goths.”
The now cut up rabbit went into a skillet. “What happens if you find a way home? Will you abandon me?”
“I already told you I don’t do that. The fun will be figuring out how to keep you at home without disrupting too many things, although the idea of you using a hyperbeam on Letterman’s Stupid Pet Tricks segment does have the potential to be very amusing.”
“I don’t know how to use hyperbeam.”
“There goes another dream. Maybe you can learn how before I figure out how to get home. Blasting Letterman into tiny bits should be good for a laugh from his kind of audience.” His eyes widened. “Do you see me going home?”
She paused. “I don’t see you either going home or not going home.” Then she crammed the organs from the rabbits into her mouth and began chewing.
He watched her for a minute. “That’s so neat. My body can’t handle that much raw meat. I’d be puking in minutes.”
She swallowed loudly and licked her muzzle. “And yet you think pokechow is just as good for you as it is for me.”
“I haven’t thrown it back up yet,” he pointed out. He began loading the shotgun. “It’s got a tube magazine that holds eight rounds. With one in battery, that gives me nine shots before I have to reload.” He smiled at her anxious expression. “Trust me when I say you’ll be my first weapon in any conflict.”
“That’s good to hear.” She came over to sit next to him. “Can we try to let me into your mind now? The rabbit will take several minutes before I have to do anything to it.”
“Remind me to get a download of edible plants around here. I’m getting tired of a diet of just meat.”
“You’re avoiding my question.”
“I heard you.” He double checked the safety on the shotgun and chambered a round. Then he leaned the weapon against the tree next to him. “What do I need to do?”
“How do you communicate with me mind to mind? Knowing which method you use may help.”
“I picture your face in my mind and hold a conversation with you.”
Her ears flicked and she shook her head slowly. “Trust you to find a way to do that which I’ve never heard of before. Just relax and try to let me in.”
He turned to face her. “I’ll do it.”
Scheherazade reached out and cradled his face in her hands. “This is very important to me. Pokegirls with telepathy like to be in their tamer’s mind. It seems to satisfy some need that other pokegirls apparently don’t have.”
“Stop talking. I’m not going to fight you.”
She closed her eyes. “Here comes the first attempt.” Several minutes passed and then she began speaking in a quiet, far away voice. “I am here. I can’t describe how your mind feels, but it’s like I belong here.” She frowned slightly and her head turned a bit. “No, not right here, over there. I’ve never seen mental architecture this complex before. It’s like I’m in a maze, but there’s a lit path just for me that shows me where to go. There are all these names of places, of worlds, no, of universes. Perinthia. Tirsul. Kalis. I see more races than even Sukebe could have imagined in his wildest dreams. The Shewa.” She shivered. “The Coldatis, a race which is usually known only as the enemy. So many names swirl around me as I move to the place where I will truly belong.” She was silent for another minute. “It’s so beautiful. This feels like home.”
Kerrik felt something click inside his head, like a bayonet locking into the lugs on a rifle. ”Something is wrong. Pull out.”
Scheherazade’s eyes opened. “I cannot. You are my general and we are together as it should be.”
“Damnit, Scheherazade, you just made yourself a target. You have no idea what this could do to you.”
“I do not understand.”
“Fucking right you don’t. If I can’t find a way home, as a last resort I was going to contact the other Kerrik Wolf. If he can determine which universe I came from, he could return me to there, if he doesn’t decide I’m too much of a threat and just obliterate me from existence. You just put yourself in those same crosshairs.” He sighed. “I’m supposed to protect you and there’s no way I can protect you from him.”
“Why would he decide that you’re a potential threat?”
“I’m not a potential anything.” He tapped his temple. “I know everything about him. I know his secrets, his goals, and I know the things he has told no one, not even his family. Hell, I know things he hasn’t told Willow. Any of those things might make him decide to kill my body and destroy my soul before it can go to the lands of the dead.”
Her ears flicked. “Do you think he would do that to you?”
“I would if I were him, which is why I haven’t sent him a message yet. If I have to, I’m hoping I can talk fast enough to make him decide that I could be useful to him instead of a threat.” He shrugged. “I don’t have anything against him, and he’ll know that. He’ll also realize that I know how dangerous he is and that he knows that I know and so on into infinity.” Kerrik looked at his hands. “But between him and Sanctuary, at least he’ll make it quick and painless.” He raised haunted eyes to meet hers. “I am not going back to Sanctuary. What that Witch did to me, I don’t think I can take it again. Having the Psi-Dyke stab me in the heart hurt less than what she did.”
“The spell activates every pain nerve in your body and keeps it active until the spell is ended. I’ve seen it kill people being interrogated with it.”
“I figured as much. I’m not ready to give up, but I am going to do everything I can to stay out of Sanctuary’s reach.”
“That only makes sense.” She wrapped her arm around him. “You need more protection than I can provide.”
“You are like a fucking recording, you know that? More pokegirls, more pokegirls, more pokegirls.”
She turned and breathed in his ear. “Look at me and tell me that I’m wrong.”
He flinched away. “Right or wrong doesn’t make it any easier. I have to take care of them. I have to give them a home and a place in my life. I have to watch them fight my battles.”
“It would be easier if you didn’t see them as people, but it is who you are and I do not want you to change that.”
He looked at the sky as if seeking answers in the clouds. “How many? How many is enough?”
“That depends on their quality. If I had my way, I’d surround you with an army to keep you safe. Unfortunately, the time of pokegirl armies is over and in any case I wouldn’t want to share you with so many.” Her arm tightened slightly. “This means I want as few pokegirls as possible in your harem. That should make you happier.”
He looked at her for several seconds before pushing to his feet. “What would make me happier right now is a hot bath, but I’ll take another trip to the stream where I cleaned up last time. I’ll be quick, so the rabbit won’t have time to burn before we get back.”
Scheherazade accepted the change of topic without comment. “And after that?”
“We eat and then we go somewhere quiet where I can burn a couple of shotgun rounds getting used to how this thing handles. After that we’ll come back here and in the morning we’ll go to Dundalk.”